I just discovered this thread. I have been a freelance writer for about 15 years now, because, frankly, I'm not talented enough to do anything else. But here are some recent samples of crud I've written:
400 Different Canadian Wildfires
The rat at the end of an error
taping drugs for later underneath the sink basin of the motel room
the height of their powers in the age of shots and prayers
takes this chaos outside to stimulate the economy
quietly shelving projects forever unfinished
with headphones on
the rent wasn't the slumlord's child, but they did choose to raise it
you don't get to bless this mess you made then hit the road
while your conscience goes on sleeping, unbothered
by consequences calling all the way down the hall
it's a wild age
it's a wry old age
it's a wilder age
burning thyme, time and sage
paid an unfair wage
evaluate your practices and learn where they came from
the Canadian wildfires spread an eerie haze across most of the eastern states
alive in purgatory
cannot believe the sky is as raw pummeling orange and ruined as the west coast sees every summer
but have you seen my new chainsaw and hockey mask?
return everything to the status quo
sweet disposition but expert hater
wrecked homes while cuck's wife became overprotective of her phone
whenever he was around
this is in fact everyone's first rodeo
went awry
self-consciousnessly miserable cringe by design
thematic pivot to 11 o'clock, sunday morning
wiggle room to spontaneously combust is kind of like passing out in peace
or peacing the f*ck out
skin wouldn't stop sticking to the sheets
never going to stay up with you all night
who taught you to hate yourself like that?
sighilist doesn't remember their first beer
gaythiest will never forget their last
surrendering cobras and nifty little sleepers looking further afield
than was physically possible
they all had two bottles of something on their mind
but life usually liked to pull the rug out from underneath
and the fires are catching up to themselves.
Professor of Logic
Go smiling, all the whiling
something else has caught up with you
be it unresolved debt or flippant thought
vital organs become more inflamed
than the moth attracted to an illuminated phone screen
it mistook for a candle, lit
a series of inferences
looting tonight — take all you can carry
split too much fat of no real use
rendered down to soap to wash off this thirst of anger
blood libel — it’s logical
or topical, dueling spit-takes of lifelong students
meant to entertain, not mislead
gathering recruits, the rhetoric breeds
.5 led breaks on the page, gets in your eyes
a series of differences
bass lines become flat lines
later disbelief budded
the soil is lush and giving
he smoked the whole damn cigarette and the bus never came
this is a prison cell of learned doctors
this is the cancer ward of ghosts to come
just a passing thought, in the parking lot
might as well learn to haunt while we’re here
it’s black or it’s white
but mostly it’s just static.