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A Game Of Thrones: To the point of the TV show, no spoilers beyond that

Mr.Noodles

By Mr.Noodles
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taxi Canucks Second-Line

taxi

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I'd like to take this opportunity to thank the producers for not subjecting us to a full frontal shot of Brienne....

Gwendoline+Christie+Arrivals+Game+Thrones+7bmas0QaAs2x.jpg

Once you take off all the armour, she's not really as butchy as they make her out to be....really really tall, but mostly feminine.

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King Heffy Canucks Hall-of-Famer

King Heffy

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I'd like to take this opportunity to thank the producers for not subjecting us to a full frontal shot of Brienne....

I'm more grateful for the lack of full frontal nudity in the scene with Loras and Littlefinger's gift to him. Ygrette, on the other hand, should never put those wildling threads back on again.

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Wetcoaster Canucks First-Line

Wetcoaster

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"Kissed by Fire" was another strong episode in what is shaping up as very strong season with one of the best one on one duels and with a flaming sword no less - said sword being kissed by fire. And maybe the best scene thus far in 3.5 seasons between Jaime and Brienne when we learn the back story of how he came to be called The Kingslayer and all was not as it seemed.

The episode could easily have been musically themed by that classic 60's girl group The Dixie Cups - "Goin' to the chapel and we're gonna get married" with advertising spots by Hot Tubs 'R Us.

The opening scene in the cave of the Brotherhood Without Banners features a mano-a-mano sword fight to the death between Sandor "The Hound" Clegane" and Beric Dondarrion former Lord of Blackhaven ( and currently the Lightning Lord) maybe the best one on one duel we have yet seen in GoT. Beric cuts his hand and his blood turns his broadsword into a GoT version of a light sabre which given The Hound's pathological fear of fire as he was scarred with fire as child by his sadistic brother gives Beric the initial advantage. However just when it seems Beric will prevail and dispatch The Hound his flaming sword shatters and The Hounds cleaves him through shoulder to the torso and that has got to hurt. It seems the Thoros of Myr the Red Priest to the Lord of Light is administering some version of last rites to the fallen Beric

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The fact that The Hound prevailed in the trial by combat enrages Arya and she grabs a knife to take her revenge directly as the Hound for killing her friend, the butcher boy as he lays exhausted on the ground but she is stopped. As she is expressing her displeasure the suddenly resurrected Beric tells her that The Hound is free to go this time and the he is the second Clegane to have killed him ( twice earlier by the Hound's brother Gregor - impaled on a lance and sword through the eye so this makes a Clegane brothers trifecta). Resurrection ??? Talk about your Jedo mind tricks the Lord of the Light's power - Arya is astonished and asks if it is possible to resurrect her father Eddard Stark who as we saw lost his head to King Joffrey. Nope sorry no can do says Beric. He notes this is his sixth resurrection and each time back he loses a bit more of himself.

And Arya discovers the Brotherhood's plan to take her to her brother King Robb and ransom her - not really but they want to do but they do need gold after all.

Later we get a different sort of mano-a-mano action featuring Loras Tyrell and yet another of Littlefinfger's sex spies - this time of the male persuasion.

And the various wedding plans proceed apace although there is apparently going to be some surprises when it is revealed who is intended to end up married to whom.

Littlefinger (on his way to his marriage of convenience) is disturbed to learn that there is plan afoot to marry off Sansa Stark to Loras Tyrell which Magaery tells Sansa that she will have Joffrey consent to once she is his queen. Littlefinger's plans for Sansa seem in danger after all he will have a spare feather bed on his ship. He renews his offer to take her away from King's Landing by way of his boat anchored in the harbour and she (thinking about her impending marriage to Loras) declines. It seems everyone in Westeros realizes that Loras is gay, maybe it is time someone told Sansa who has shown herself to not be the sharpest knife in the drawer in the past.

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And speaking of the impending Royal Wedding - it is going to be an extravagant and costly affair which Tyrion as Master of the Coin objects to when meeting with Lady Olenna. She points out that a Royal Wedding is a great distraction for the common folk so they do not rise up and kill the better class of folk. Sort of a riff on the Mastercard commercial - The cost of an extravagant Royal Wedding... prohibitive - but the cost of avoiding being on the wrong end of a revolution of the people... priceless. After a crack about Tyrion being noting but a "browbeaten bookkeeper" Lady Olenna offers for the Tyrell's to pay half of the cost of the wedding but in return Tyrion will owe her in future. Not realizing that he has been played and that maybe Tyrion is not the smartest person in this room, he is greatly pleased with himself at saving the treasury a huge sum.

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He then heads off to a meeting with his father but is surprised to see Cersei at the table as well looking inordinately pleased with herself having conveyed the Littlefinger intelligence of the planned marriage between Sansa Stark and Loras Tyrell. The family that plots together, stays together, eh???

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Tyrion begins to proclaim how he has saved the treasury a great deal of money when his father interrupts and basically dismisses his achievement. And then the big surprise... Tywin decrees that Sansa will not marry Loras Tyrell but instead be wed to Tyrion who is shocked and says to his father this is incredibly cruel - to inflict him upon Sansa thus showing some empathy for her. Too bad, marry her and get her with child ASAP says Dad. This is all about politics. If they marry, the Lannisters will have “the key to the north” – i.e. heir-to-Winterfell (if Robb dies) Sansa – and will be much more powerful than the Tyrells.

Meanwhile Cersei looking like the cat that swallowed the canary having been responsible for alerting her father to the impending Sansa/Loras nuptials notes that getting Sansa as his wife says to Tyrion “This is more than you deserve.” She is vastly amused by her brother's discomfiture at being ordered to marry Sansa. But then her father smacks her upside the head and decrees that she will marry Loras Tyrell - despite his apparent preference for "different bits". She is horrified at yet another political marriage. Cersei begs Tywin, “don’t make me do it again, Father” Too bad, so sad says dad - just do as I command. Oh yeah says Dad and this will put “an end to the disgusting rumours about you (and Jaime), once and for all.” Cersei looks like she has taken a club over the head.

Jaime and Brienne are brought to the home of one of Robb's bannermen, Roose Bolton. Jaime is taken to Qyburn, that sole survivor at Harrenhal that Robb discovered in the season premiere. We learn he was a maester but was stripped of his license for performing medical experiments that were "too bold." They debate how to handle Jaime's wound and he insists on having Qyburn treat him without any Milk of the Poppy. And the soul baring by Jaime to Brienne about the real events that led to him killing the Mad King who first ordered Jaime to kill his own father and then was about to burn everyone in Kings Landing with wildfire that he had stored about city in the other hot tub scene sans sex. This has to be one of the most powerful scenes thus far in the 3.5 seasons of GoT.

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We meet Stannis' neglected wife, Selyse and deformed daughter, Shireen. Selyse is even more devoted to the Fire God than Stannis is, seeing herself as a failure for not being able to give Stannis a living son - while keeping her dead babies in jars. She knows all about Melisandre and Stannis and is not upset but rather in awe. Meanwhile, Shireen is lovely but she has "greyscale" on her face as she offers to keep her friend, The Onion Knight company and teach him to read while he is incarcerated for treason.

Robb Stark had a choice: be reasonable or be honorable but shows that he has inherited his father's prickly sense of honour at all costs when he executes Lord Rickard Karstark for murdering two Lannister children. He is acting against the advice of his mother, his wife and his uncle Lord Edmure who point out he will lose the Karstark alliance and troops. The beheading scene hearkens back to the pilot episode ("Winter is Coming") when his father beheads a ranger of the Night Watch who fled in terror of the White Walkers. In this case the execution costs Robb half his army. Strategically he looks to be between a rock and hard place - he cannot attack King's Landing and he cannot draw them out to a field of his own choosing. What to do? He hits upon the plan of taking the Lannister family home of Casterly Rock but to do that he must make peace with the father of the girl he declined to marry after being betrothed. It seems some broken oaths can get you killed but not others.

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The Danaerys Stormborn story arc shows her continuing to grow into a legendary leader when she offers the Unsullied their freedom to take whatever names they choose rather than the ones forced on them by the slavers. And Grey Worm elects to keep his name to honour the day he was freed by Danaerys:

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Ser Barristan wonders if she will be the sort of ruler he can serve who truly deserves his loyalty. He served the Mad King and King Robert who was a great warrior but a bad king as he ponders the bounds of honour and loyalty.

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There are some great lines in this episode:

After the apparent death of Beric and Arya being held back from killing The Hound:

“Burn in hell!” she screams. “He will. But not today.” comes the voice of Beric who has been miraculously resurrected.

And when Arya learns that Gendry has decided to stay with the Brotherhood as their smith and not travel on with her.

“I’m done serving, I never had a family.” She says plaintively “I could be your family“ He is obviously touched but points out "You’d never be my family. You’d be m’lady.”

Thoros has brought Beric back from the dead six times but as beric notes:

“Every time I come back, I’m a bit less.”

Arya asks thinking of her father and all she has lost:

“Could you bring back a man without a head? Not six times, just once.”

During the meeting between Tyrion and Lady Olenna on why there should be such a costly Royal Wedding in the first place and how to allocate the costs, Lady Olenna notes of Tyrion:

“I was told you were drunk, impertinent and thoroughly debauched. You can imagine my disappointment at finding nothing but a browbeaten bookkeeper.”

On Tywin's plan to marry of Cersei again in another political marriage as with Robert Baratheon - this time to Loras Tyrell whose taste in partner's lies with the other gender, well so what:

"She's missing some of Loras' favorite bits."

Ygritte after noting her red hair means she is "kissed by fire" says to Jon Snow while they are pampered in the local spa (well a cave with a hot spring at least):

"You swore some vows — I want you to break them. So much for Jon's vow of celibacy although she is proved mistaken when she says to him "You know nothing, Jon Snow!" and he demonstrates to her that like Podrick he truly does know what he is doing at least in certain endeavours.

Robb when he orders Karstark locked away in dungeon pending execution and his henchman hanged for murdering the two Lannister children as vengeance. One pipes up that he only watched the guards and didn't really do anything so Robb considers for a moment and then orders:

"This one is the watcher. Hang him last so he can watch the others die."

Jaime negotiating with the Maester Qyburn who is to try to save him from his infected arm and wants to give him Milk of the Poppy to knock him out- Jaime having little trust in the mad doctor says no... do it without:

Q: There will be pain.

JL: I'll scream.

Q: Quite a bit of pain.

JL: I'll scream loudly.

And the second hot tub scene where Jaime explains to Brienne the real reason he broke his oath of loyalty and killed the Mad King after gratuitously insulting her about her failure to protect Renly (it seems the loss of his sword hand has not taught him that sometimes it is best to not be glib and insult people) he then actually apologizes to her and complements her fighting skills noting:

“You’ve protected me better than most,” he admits, then asks for a truce. “You need trust to have a truce,” she says warily. “I trust you,” he responds quietly.

Jaime Lannister on Ned Stark's swift but mistaken judgment that he was The Kingslayer when he comes upon Laime with the dead Mad King stabbed through the back.:

"By what right does the wolf judge the lion?"

And when he collapses in exhaustion she calls for help for "The Kingslayer" and he says plaintively to her:

"My name is Jaime".

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Contrast Jaime's decision to kill the Mad King to that of Ser Barristan:

"A man of honour keeps his vows, even if he's serving a drunk or a lunatic."

Next week "The Climb"

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taxi Canucks Second-Line

taxi

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Did anyone expect grey worm to be not so damn skinny. Eat a steak or two.

Dude, he has no balls. That means no testosterone. He was castrated before hitting puberty. He's not going to develop secondary sexual characteristics like muscles.

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Wetcoaster Canucks First-Line

Wetcoaster

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Apparently the ratings for Game of Thrones continue to climb with each episode - the last episode ironically was titled "The Climb".

For the fourth week in a row, HBO’s Game of Thrones hit a series high in the ratings.

Sunday night’s 9 p.m. telecast delivered 5.5 million viewers. Across two plays, viewership also hit a new gross nightly high with 6.8 million viewers, surpassing the third season’s debut evening for the first time (premiere night had two replays instead of the usual one).

http://insidetv.ew.c...limb-continues/

We are half-way through Season 3.

The Climb was an exciting episode and despite the ascent up a cliff of ice, was one of the few episodes that did not end with a cliffhanger, although the brief glimpse of Danaerys and her army on the march looks to set up a major story line for next episode

This episode illustrated that being a woman in Westeros can suck. The solution to this male dominance it seems is to get yourself three dragons as Danaerys has done.

Sansa's day dreams of her life with Ser Loras Tyrell is dashed whn Tyrion has to tell her of their arranged marriage. Tyrion arrives, the bearer of bad news. Sansa insists on having Shae stay in the room. "This is awkward," Tyrion says...

Probably a good thing considering his preferences. Lady Sanas Stark once again proves that while she may be a beauty she is less than perceptive when it comes to judging men. Just not the sharpest knife in the drawer. And Ser Loras??? Loras talks about how he's always dreamed of getting married just like Sansa. Too much like Sansa -- he's dreamed of all the little details, the wedding dress. Everything but the girl.

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Lady Olenna, the Queen of Thorns is out-manoeuvred by Lord Tywin Lannister and the Tyrells are now under his control.

Ygritte is literally leashed to a man she knows will betray her people but hey that thing he does when they are alone makes up for that.

And a working girl can even end up being the target... literally when Ros begins and ends as target practise for King Joffrey and his new crossbow.

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And Cersei remains unhappy with her forced "choice" of husband. Tyrion and his sister have a moment of bonding over their forced marriages. "We can have them both killed," Cersei suggests.

Then Tyrion notes: "It's hard to say which of the four of us is getting the worst of this arrangement." Cersei finally gives Tyrion something he's been longing for -- credit from his family for defending King's Landing during Blackwater. So he stops trying to ask everybody except his sister whether she tried to have him killed and just asks outright. Since only Cersei or Joffrey could have given the order, she cannot answer his question without implicating her son, the king. But Tyrion reads her -- it was Joffrey. And who can blame him? Remember Tyrion slapping Joffrey?

Tyrion is worried his life is still in danger. "Probably," Cersei says, but says Joff won't do anything while Tywin is around.

And this episode contained some of the best CGI work as Jon Snow and the Wildlings begin their ascent of The Wall. The climbing sequences reminded me somewhat of an older Clint Eastwood movie - The Eiger Sanction.

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Ygritte states that she knows Jon is still loyal to the Night's Watch. Of course she does -- he's not a very good liar and he comes off far too noble to be a traitor. But Jon doesn't have to worry about her tattling, only her wrath if he goes through with his plan. "You're going to be loyal to your woman," she decides for him, noting the The Night's Watch and Mance don't care if they live or die ... "it's you and me that matter." Of course if he betrays her... well then she will cut off his man bits.

And when on the ascent up The Wall Orell cuts Jon and Ygritte loose from the climbing safety rope and nearly sends them plunging to their deaths, clearly Ygritte was onto something when she says it is her and Jon Snow against the world as he saves her life.

As Sam and Gilly are on the run she instructs him on the proper way to build a campfire and is more than a little intrigued when she learns Sam is "high born". Suddenly not being able to properly build a fire seem much less important.

So we did learn some useful outdoors skills... how to climb a sheer ice wall, how to build a campfire and the best way to skin a cat rabbit - after the cat fight between Meera and Osha refereed by Bran. Oh yeah and apparently those visions can be accompanied by what looks like epilectic seizures as we see with Jojen thrashing about.

And Aryana adds to her skills - she has been instructed in sword play by a master and now she is learning archery.

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Probably not a good thing to be on her bucket list. And it seems that the Red Woman Melisandre made it when she buys Gendry and carts him off.

And why Gendry?? Remember her telling Stannis there are others with the requsitie bloodlines blood that she could potentially use to work her magic (Gendry, you'll recall, is one of ex-king Robert Baratheon's bastard kids). The Red Woman assures Gendry as he's being shoved into a cart, "You will make kings rise and fall."

Arya hates Melisandre on sight. She grabs her and spins her around. Melisandre is shocked at being handled in such a manner. "You're a witch," Arya says. "You're going to hurt him." Melisandre snatches Arya's face and peers into her soul, or something, then puts New Order into my head by saying: "I see darkness in you ... brown eyes, blue eyes, green eyes -- eyes you'll shut forever. We will meet again."

Meanwhile back at the dungeon Theon Greyjoy is being tortured physically and mentally... but by whom and why? After holding out hope of release his captor says "If you think this has a happy ending, you haven't been paying attention," And then proceeds to skin his finger... not a rabbit but nonetheless not much fun for Theon.

And we get another arranged marriage - this time overseen by Robb Stark who commands his uncle Edmure to marry a Frey daughter - you know the family that Robb rejected for his wife but whom he needs to fill out his army. Edmure is less than thrilled but Robb appeals to his (non-existent) better nature and tries to guilt trip him "I've won every battle, but I'm losing this war," he says. "If we don't do this, and do it now, we're lost." That seems to have little effect so Brynden “Blackfish” Tully intervenes and basically tells his nephew Edmure to agree or he will take a beating. That does work and Edmure agrees to the marriage.

The Harrenhahl scene at dinner was excellent as Jaime and Brienne dine with Robb Stark's bannerman Roose Bolton. Jaime is trying to learn how to cut meat one-handed while the Lady of Tarth has been put in pink dress, Bolton agrees to send Jaime back to King's Landing -- without Brienne, who will be charged with abetting treason.Jaime tries to save Brienne, just like he did last time. Bolton shuts him down with one of the episode's best lines:

"I would hope you'd have learned your lesson about overplaying your ... position."

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And in a duel of another sort we have Tywin, the Hand of the King imposing his will on Lady Olenna Tyrell, the Queen of Thorns. And another couple of great lines.

Tywin wants Cersei to marry Loras. Olenna objects that Cersei, whom Tywin describes as the "most beautiful woman in the kingdoms," is too old to have children. Twyin counters that the marriage will keep Loras' sexual orientation a secret. But Olenna doesn't seem to mind that Loras is, as she puts it, "a sword-swallower through and through." She then tries to rattle Tywin by asking if he's engaged in any such behaviour himself -- if not sword-swallowing, then perhaps some sword-sheathing or mutual sword-polishing. "Never!" says Tywin. So Olenna then plays her strongest card: Cersei's scandalous incest with Jaime. He's ready for that. He says if she refuses the marriage he'll appoint Loras to the Kingsguard, a position where he will be forbidden to marry or breed, thus potentially halting the Tyrell line. He knows Olenna will never allow that to happen. He's got her. Olenna is impressed: "It's a rare enough thing, a man who lives up to his reputation."

Up next week Episode 7 - The Bear and the Maiden Fair. This is the name of a popular song in Westeros - Locke and his men earlier sang the song as they made their way to Harrenhal after capturing Jaime Lannister and Brienne of Tarth.

And the promo for Episode 7:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f6Bo1kSpDAk

Edited by Wetcoaster
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