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Break up advice and why?


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#1 EoH

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 03:00 AM

So recently I been dating this girl for about a year and a half and if you did read the title I ended things because i knew it wouldnt work out between us. I knew even though i wanted to make it work, i couldnt jeopardize the sake of my future.

However, after the break up shes constantly texting me about how shes better then me, meeting new guys, comparing new guys to me and basically saying everything/everyone is better than me etc.

I tried blocking her on my phone, but fido does not allow this option apparently, and there is no app available to block the number either. Im also not going to switch my number just because of this problem.

Now the crap she tells me does hurt, its basically insecurities that I told her about myself during our relationship that she uses to just ridicule me and try to ruin me in anyway possible. She also was threatening to call my friends and say crap about me to them as well.

I havent replied to a single text message, but I do read it out of curiousity (yeah i know, i shouldnt, but it annoys the hell out of me if I dont).

Im just wondering, why is she doing this?

Is there anyway to block her number?

And any advice on break ups are much appreciated, i know it only lasted a year and a half, but during that time I put a lot of heart and effort into it.

Edited by EoH, 18 November 2012 - 03:01 AM.

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#2 Kumquats

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 03:16 AM

She's insecure and a sociopath with nothing better to do. Ignore it until she gets bored with you and finds a new pet to play with.
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#3 I♥Wellwood

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 03:19 AM

They wont block the number. If you really, really dont want the texts, you could get some sort of restraining order. Although I'm sure you dont want to go through with that. You're just gonna have to stick it out.

She's just being immature.

Edited by I♥Wellwood, 18 November 2012 - 03:28 AM.

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#4 flapjacks

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 03:23 AM

Did you explain to her why you wanted to end the relationship? And she sounds incredibly immature and crazy from what you've told us about her. How old is she? Seems like this borders on harassment too.

Whatever man she seems nuts. Ignore it if possible. You should be happy you managed to escape the relationship with her, and feel sorry for any other guy who would have to end up with her lol
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#5 Mountain Man

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 03:32 AM

Well get a new number. Feel bad for the person who will eventually have that previous number.

Or you could trick her and pretend that its a wrong number now and she's being a psycho to a stranger.
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#6 EoH

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 03:36 AM

Did you explain to her why you wanted to end the relationship? And she sounds incredibly immature and crazy from what you've told us about her. How old is she? Seems like this borders on harassment too.

Whatever man she seems nuts. Ignore it if possible. You should be happy you managed to escape the relationship with her, and feel sorry for any other guy who would have to end up with her lol


I explained to her why I wanted to end it and it was simply because of all these restrictions she was putting on me. I admit i had my faults too, but after i found out the trust between us was gone, I simply couldnt handle it because she was too controlling.

I gave her closure at around 1am at night and drove all the way there. The next day I get the text message stating that 'my face was the only closure she needed' and other verbal abuse.

Shes also 21.
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#7 PlayStation

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 03:47 AM

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Im just wondering, why is she doing this?


Trying to understand a woman?

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#8 Nas19

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 03:55 AM

Just ignore her. She'll eventually stop if you don't respond. She's probably just pissy that you dumped her and is trying to get revenge. She will get over it eventually and move on with her pathetic life.

But dude whatever you do, DO NOT respond to her texts. That's just what she wants. Don't feed the trolls.
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#9 Smashian Kassian

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 03:57 AM

She still cares about you that's why she's doing it.

If she didn't care why would she do it? She wouldn't she would just move on.

Maybe just tell her to leave you alone really sternly though, then after that just don't reply to whatever she says.


She just seems like she can't let go, good luck with this situation dude.

Edited by Smashian Kassian, 18 November 2012 - 03:59 AM.

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#10 Jai604

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 03:59 AM

Looooool, psycho broad.

Just ignore her, she'll eventually tire of the shenanigans.
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#11 Tortorella's Rant

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 04:07 AM



Take a page out of the Soprano book. I'm sure she has a different occupation, so just get a little creative. But keep the same idea.

(a few bad words!)

Edited by Tortorella's Rant, 18 November 2012 - 04:08 AM.

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#12 nucklehead

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 04:50 AM

Is her name Caroline?


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#13 Bertuzzi Babe

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 04:51 AM

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Removed content - inappopriate.


Oooohhh, someone got burned badly despite his protestations otherwise.

You do realize that this sort of generalization is probably one of the reasons you're such a great catch, right?

You don't really care but you've now characterized 'most girls' as whores deep down and you're writing about it at 2:24 am on a hockey board......

Uhhhh huh..... but you don't care........




OP..... do the best you can to ignore the texts. Any response from you will only serve to fuel the fire and she's looking for a response from you, any response, even a negative one because it will show her (however deludedly) that you still care. And she'll hit below the belt and exploit every insecurity you've ever shared with her in order to get that response. A difficult thing I know, to ignore them, to not even read them but she just wants to elicit a reaction from you. If you have truly moved on, accept the annoyance for a while til she gets past it and delete the texts without reading. Good luck! :)


(And by ignoring the texts, she'll get the impression that you have blocked her even though you haven't/can't! :P)

Edited by debluvscanucks, 18 November 2012 - 01:53 PM.

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#14 Mainly Mattias

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 05:13 AM

Sorry to hear about it.

Found this on the fido forum by googling. Might help if you have an iphone and you're just getting texts from her..

Re: How to block a phone number?

09-09-2012 07:14 PM

pberry wrote:

You can block it easily.

Go on the App Store and download the Fido My account app, just search for the keyword 'FIDO'

Then download the first one 'Fido My Account'

when you're done downloading and installing it, open the App and go to the 'Services Section' and chose the iphone special pack ( or whatever its called ) and there it should be pretty much common sense you will see block number option and then you know what to do Posted Image


You're welcome and have a nice day.


incorrect. That only allows you to access ETM, which does allow you to block texts but not calls. OP was asking about calls.


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#15 sedated

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 05:50 AM

You broke up with her. She probably liked you. If you liked someone and they broke up with you, you'd probably be upset too. Would you freak out like she did? Maybe. Maybe not. A lot of sane, smart, intelligent people have gone crazy before during a bad relationship or after a break up.

The insecurities she's making you feel, are probably the same that you made her feel when you broke up with her.

The way you talked about how you broke up, makes me believe you just kind of winged it one day and you didn't plan the best course of action. "I can't jeopardize my future" is usually slang for a bunch of stuff that doesn't actually jeopardize your future, but it might make something inconvenient for you that you didn't want to sacrifice. It happens.

Regardless, breaking up with someone mutually actually takes a lot of planning, and grown up talk. Most people don't do this and it can end in a lot of drama, such as the crazies. Considering you broke up with her even though she was in a position to hurt you, which means you were still more into her than not, to me says that you didn't have a very good break up strategy. There is no real solid way to stop someone from being crazy in this situation. All you can do is wait. If someone goes nuts after a break up, they're probably going to be nuts until they get over it, which can take a long time sometimes.

You can either really think things through and try to find a way to approach her in a kind way and talk about things, voice your feelings, and lay it all out there. Try to discuss it with her, and let her ask questions, or try to change your mind. This is not always easy, because some people just aren't good at talking, and sometimes the person they try to talk to is just.. not going to listen. Just don't be condescending or an ass.

The other way is to fly under the radar and hope she finds someone to replace you with hopefully sooner than later. I'd really just try to make sure that you have a really valid reason to break up with someone to avoid drama next time.
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#16 Mainly Mattias

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 08:35 AM

It's not you, it's m... no, it's really you.
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#17 Shift-4

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 08:38 AM

Clearly she isn't over you. She is probably really pissed that YOU made the decision. This supposed low-life (her frame of mind towards you) dumped her. Clearly that stings for her.

Good for you for making the right decision and good for you to ignore her texts.
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#18 Peaches

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 08:43 AM

(And by ignoring the texts, she'll get the impression that you have blocked her even though you haven't/can't! :P)


Lol.

This is really the best advice so far.

Don't read them and she will think you blocked her.
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#19 PowerIce

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 09:48 AM

You gotta 1-up her. (kidding, keep ignoring)

As for breakup advice, basically keep what you're doing, ignoring the chick. It's not gonna be easy, the next few months are definitely gonna suck a bit. Sounds like you put a lot into it, not easy to just press the undo button on all your feelings. I know from exp.

Find a rebound chick that can keep you occupied till your normal again.
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#20 TOMapleLaughs

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 10:15 AM

If she is this much of a psychopath, a year in a half is far too long to figure that out. But i think you knew. You are now paying the penalty of dragging it out as long as you did.

I suggest that you pretend that you want to get back together with her, only so you can dump her again harder. Then tell us how that works out. I'm suggesting that you do this for our amusement. Chop-chop!
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#21 Stefan

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 10:19 AM

Respond with "hello? Who is this? If you continue to text my 7 year old daughter these messages I will be forced to contact the police."
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#22 kazin!

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 10:32 AM

A year and a half (especially if she's 21) is quite a long time..."psycho broad" indeed. Some girls are just absolutely crazy when it comes to dating.
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#23 Jägermeister

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 11:07 AM

Theres a name for a lady like that, but it isn't used in high society... outside of a kennel.
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#24 Dazzle

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 11:15 AM

Keep all the texts.

If she brings the fight to you, you bring the fight to her - call the police. Maybe the non-emergency number. Get it down on record. If she tries to do crap later on, she's fracked.

Vice versa for a reversal of the genders. If a guy is threatening you, it is most definitely worthy to let police know.

Edited by Dazzle, 18 November 2012 - 11:16 AM.

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#25 Bertuzzi Babe

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 11:19 AM

Lol.

This is really the best advice so far.

Don't read them and she will think you blocked her.


Ignore, as in don't answer, don't acknowledge you've received/read them. Was that really so difficult to grasp? :huh:

Edited by Bertuzzi Babe, 18 November 2012 - 11:20 AM.

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#26 elvis15

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 11:49 AM

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But seriously, if you consider it harassment - especially if you think there's any chance of it escalating - go to the police. That way it's on record. They will recommend you change your number and the process will already be in place to provide further legal help if needed.

As far as your old number going to someone else, it'll be out of circulation for 3 months so unless she's really persistent at sending texts to a number that won't answer for that long, the person who gets it after those three months will likely not have any issues.

Edited by elvis15, 18 November 2012 - 11:51 AM.

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#27 Intoewsables

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 11:53 AM

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If she has to tell you about all the guys she's meeting that are way better than you, she probably hasn't. Hopefully for your sake, she finds someone else soon and moves on.
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#28 Niloc009

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 12:14 PM

What is an 8 year old doing giving break up advice to people?

You've probably never even had a date.


UMB. I like you. But you're like, 14. Lol.

Post disappeared. What?

Edited by Niloc009, 18 November 2012 - 12:24 PM.

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#29 Ghostsof1915

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 12:30 PM

If you're upset and she is seeing new guys, imagine how the guy she's dating must feel if she's sending all these texts.

Don't respond, she'll get the idea. As Dazzle said, keep the texts, if they get threatening or stalker type now you've got evidence. My married friends wonder why I'm single. Probably because I see more and more nightmare relationships these days. Makes me want to stay single.

Edited by Ghostsof1915, 18 November 2012 - 12:31 PM.

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#30 c00kies

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Posted 18 November 2012 - 12:53 PM

Hire a hitman, that usually solves my problems :P
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