confessions

[Xbox]

I hate cats. I just can't stand them. I tell people I'm allergic to cats as a socially acceptable way to not have to interact with someones cat.

[ChenWei91]

I don't remember who any of you people are.

[riffraff]

On 9/3/2019 at 11:56 AM, Xbox said:

I hate cats. I just can't stand them. I tell people I'm allergic to cats as a socially acceptable way to not have to interact with someones cat.

I don’t hate them because I don’t hate any animal but I don’t like them.  I don’t see the point of a cat.  If you live on a farm and they can roam around controlling rodents then that’s cool but otherwise all they do is wait to be fed, crap in a box and spread that disgusting kitty litter dust around your entire home.

[riffraff]

On 8/13/2019 at 10:33 AM, Tre Mac said:

I like Madonna's La Isla Bonita and it's one of the better songs I hear on Coast FM(I have no control over the radio at work)

 

 

Fight me

Dude.

 

like a prayer.

 

[Xbox]

46 minutes ago, riffraff said:

I don’t hate them because I don’t hate any animal but I don’t like them.  I don’t see the point of a cat.  If you live on a farm and they can roam around controlling rodents then that’s cool but otherwise all they do is wait to be fed, crap in a box and spread that disgusting kitty litter dust around your entire home.

Yep and don't forget they scratch the s**t out of everything!

 

 

 

[Alflives]

3 hours ago, riffraff said:

I don’t hate them because I don’t hate any animal but I don’t like them.  I don’t see the point of a cat.  If you live on a farm and they can roam around controlling rodents then that’s cool but otherwise all they do is wait to be fed, crap in a box and spread that disgusting kitty litter dust around your entire home.

 Have tried adding ketchup?

[Master 112]

pouting right now about that time when i was a teenager working a job i didn't like/want because my parents wanted me to do it. i decided i was gonna save up my money and build a really nice gaming computer- wanted to spend like 2-2.5k on it. parents then kept taking all my money for property taxes, beer and bull$&!#, and then when christmas came around, dad (knowing i wanted to save up for a computer) made me look online with him for like $5-600 prebuilt ones to pick out as my present. i told him to forget it lol.

 

e: honestly, they tried, but i'd be lying if i didn't have incredible resentment for mom & dad. i don't love them. i never bonded with dad as a child- and while i think i bonded with mom when i was young, by the time i was old enough to start comprehending the world, her histrionics, drunk antics and childish emotional freak-outs damaged in short order my perception of her, and i ended up spending all of my formative years low-key bloody terrified of both parents. yelling, abuse, door-slamming, abandonment threats and behaviours, and so on... like wtf does my 300-pound dad need to be intimidating 5-year-old me for because i was distressed at school or smth and got sent home. just absolute moronic choices in a lot of ways on their end- no idea how they thought theirs was the way to raise a family.

 

my mom made me a sandwich once. i was like 6 or so. when i was done, she asked me how it was, and i answered honestly that it had too much mayo. (i am autistic and don't always understand implicit social rules... particularly when i'm 6 years old.) so my dad apparently overheard it or something because like 5 minutes later he comes at me screaming his lungs to pop. like absolute full on outrage, said some completely nasty stuff to me i didn't deserve. i didn't even understand what i did wrong lmao. cried for hours. i was terrified and expected him to physically engage me. i've so many stories like this one- never open up about 'em, don't need any kind of therapy garbage and there's no tactful way to vent to people about my So Sad(tm) childhood. but it sucks to keep your demons buried and i needed to vent.

 

so many wasted years, so much hardship, so many lost opportunities, so many interests i had and wanted to pursue but couldn't, and tbh they're a lot to blame. i keep in touch with them and visit sometimes, and i'm sure i'll cry when they're gone, but man--they screwed me over. they screwed my siblings over. we shouldn't have had to grow up with what we did. we're all &^@#ed because of them.

Edited September 11, 2019 by 112

[luckylager]

19 hours ago, 112 said:

pouting right now about that time when i was a teenager working a job i didn't like/want because my parents wanted me to do it. i decided i was gonna save up my money and build a really nice gaming computer- wanted to spend like 2-2.5k on it. parents then kept taking all my money for property taxes, beer and bull$&!#, and then when christmas came around, dad (knowing i wanted to save up for a computer) made me look online with him for like $5-600 prebuilt ones to pick out as my present. i told him to forget it lol.

 

e: honestly, they tried, but i'd be lying if i didn't have incredible resentment for mom & dad. i don't love them. i never bonded with dad as a child- and while i think i bonded with mom when i was young, by the time i was old enough to start comprehending the world, her histrionics, drunk antics and childish emotional freak-outs damaged in short order my perception of her, and i ended up spending all of my formative years low-key bloody terrified of both parents. yelling, abuse, door-slamming, abandonment threats and behaviours, and so on... like wtf does my 300-pound dad need to be intimidating 5-year-old me for because i was distressed at school or smth and got sent home. just absolute moronic choices in a lot of ways on their end- no idea how they thought theirs was the way to raise a family.

 

my mom made me a sandwich once. i was like 6 or so. when i was done, she asked me how it was, and i answered honestly that it had too much mayo. (i am autistic and don't always understand implicit social rules... particularly when i'm 6 years old.) so my dad apparently overheard it or something because like 5 minutes later he comes at me screaming his lungs to pop. like absolute full on outrage, said some completely nasty stuff to me i didn't deserve. i didn't even understand what i did wrong lmao. cried for hours. i was terrified and expected him to physically engage me. i've so many stories like this one- never open up about 'em, don't need any kind of therapy garbage and there's no tactful way to vent to people about my So Sad(tm) childhood. but it sucks to keep your demons buried and i needed to vent.

 

so many wasted years, so much hardship, so many lost opportunities, so many interests i had and wanted to pursue but couldn't, and tbh they're a lot to blame. i keep in touch with them and visit sometimes, and i'm sure i'll cry when they're gone, but man--they screwed me over. they screwed my siblings over. we shouldn't have had to grow up with what we did. we're all &^@#ed because of them.

I sometimes worry I'm too hard on my kids and expect too much out of them, but it's because I love the $&!# out of them and want them to be a better person than me in every single way.

At times I wonder if I'm being mean by correcting them, being critical and stern etc.. but then I read something like your post and feel a little better about my parenting ability.

 

112, I'm sorry your parents were &^@#ing dicks, that's some awful $&!#.

[Master 112]

3 hours ago, luckylager said:

I sometimes worry I'm too hard on my kids and expect too much out of them, but it's because I love the $&!# out of them and want them to be a better person than me in every single way.

At times I wonder if I'm being mean by correcting them, being critical and stern etc.. but then I read something like your post and feel a little better about my parenting ability.

 

112, I'm sorry your parents were &^@#ing dicks, that's some awful $&!#.

there's normal parental discipline, and then there's what my parents would do. i'm sure you're fine. just try not to forget the intensity with which children feel emotion and remember that your kids should never be afraid of you. as in a marriage, it's not you vs. them- it's you and them vs. the problem.

 

so much of the 'bad' i did as a kid was because i kept being put into situations i couldn't manage because of my developmental issues. and the result was always that i would be chastised extremely for doing wrong with no consideration being given to /why/ i did wrong. everyone--not just my parents but teachers and other authorities--would try to make moral judgments when something went wrong in my life; i would do wrong, and so the problem must have been that i was just a bad apple. it wasn't that i needed help/support i wasn't getting, and it wasn't that i had the problem of a very bad home life. i was just an asshole and that was that.

 

we don't believe in canada that anyone under 10 has the potential to be morally culpable for homicide- but you bet your ass i got it handed to me for lots of stuff i didn't understand.  i was never provided with the tools i needed to succeed- just instructed to do it.

 

but it's a generational thing- both parents came from worse households and did their best to break the cycle. it's just unfortunate that it doesn't happen more quickly than it should.

[luckylager]

3 minutes ago, 112 said:

there's normal parental discipline, and then there's what my parents would do. i'm sure you're fine. just try not to forget the intensity with which children feel emotion and remember that your kids should never be afraid of you. as in a marriage, it's not you vs. them- it's you and them vs. the problem.

 

so much of the 'bad' i did as a kid was because i kept being put into situations i couldn't manage because of my developmental issues. and the result was always that i would be chastised extremely for doing wrong with no consideration being given to /why/ i did wrong. everyone--not just my parents but teachers and other authorities--would try to make moral judgments when something went wrong in my life; i would do wrong, and so the problem must have been that i was just a bad apple. it wasn't that i needed help/support i wasn't getting, and it wasn't that i had the problem of a very bad home life. i was just an asshole and that was that.

 

we don't believe in canada that anyone under 10 has the potential to be morally culpable for homicide- but you bet your ass i got it handed to me for lots of stuff i didn't understand.  i was never provided with the tools i needed to succeed- just instructed to do it.

 

but it's a generational thing- both parents came from worse households and did their best to break the cycle. it's just unfortunate that it doesn't happen more quickly than it should.

My folks split up when I was less than a year old. My Dad was always in the picture, but his full blown hippyness was in total opposition to the militant style of my stepdad.

I'm not gonna dig too deep, but both of my dads thought they were doing what was best for me but it only made me angry and confused.

 

I won't start on the oppressive system. The system that figured the only way to deal with me was by drugging me with $&!# that made me feel like a piece of $&!#.

 

Remnd me to talk to you about this again one day. I don't have it in me right now, but I wouldn't mind sharing at some point.

 

FWIW, my militant stepdad scared the living $&!# out of me as a kid. So I feel your issues with being intimidated as a child. I got no love for that type of behavior

[Alflives]

23 hours ago, 112 said:

pouting right now about that time when i was a teenager working a job i didn't like/want because my parents wanted me to do it. i decided i was gonna save up my money and build a really nice gaming computer- wanted to spend like 2-2.5k on it. parents then kept taking all my money for property taxes, beer and bull$&!#, and then when christmas came around, dad (knowing i wanted to save up for a computer) made me look online with him for like $5-600 prebuilt ones to pick out as my present. i told him to forget it lol.

 

e: honestly, they tried, but i'd be lying if i didn't have incredible resentment for mom & dad. i don't love them. i never bonded with dad as a child- and while i think i bonded with mom when i was young, by the time i was old enough to start comprehending the world, her histrionics, drunk antics and childish emotional freak-outs damaged in short order my perception of her, and i ended up spending all of my formative years low-key bloody terrified of both parents. yelling, abuse, door-slamming, abandonment threats and behaviours, and so on... like wtf does my 300-pound dad need to be intimidating 5-year-old me for because i was distressed at school or smth and got sent home. just absolute moronic choices in a lot of ways on their end- no idea how they thought theirs was the way to raise a family.

 

my mom made me a sandwich once. i was like 6 or so. when i was done, she asked me how it was, and i answered honestly that it had too much mayo. (i am autistic and don't always understand implicit social rules... particularly when i'm 6 years old.) so my dad apparently overheard it or something because like 5 minutes later he comes at me screaming his lungs to pop. like absolute full on outrage, said some completely nasty stuff to me i didn't deserve. i didn't even understand what i did wrong lmao. cried for hours. i was terrified and expected him to physically engage me. i've so many stories like this one- never open up about 'em, don't need any kind of therapy garbage and there's no tactful way to vent to people about my So Sad(tm) childhood. but it sucks to keep your demons buried and i needed to vent.

 

so many wasted years, so much hardship, so many lost opportunities, so many interests i had and wanted to pursue but couldn't, and tbh they're a lot to blame. i keep in touch with them and visit sometimes, and i'm sure i'll cry when they're gone, but man--they screwed me over. they screwed my siblings over. we shouldn't have had to grow up with what we did. we're all &^@#ed because of them.

Thanks for sharing @112

Far too many kids suffer because of really bad parents.  Yes, we rationalize the situation by making excuses for the parents like, “that’s all they know”, or “they were mistreated by their parents”, or “it’s the alcohol.”  There are no justifiable reasons for mistreating your children.   

Live every moment as happily as you can 112.  Your actions now are what defines who you are.  

[Alflives]

4 minutes ago, luckylager said:

My folks split up when I was less than a year old. My Dad was always in the picture, but his full blown hippyness was in total opposition to the militant style of my stepdad.

I'm not gonna dig too deep, but both of my dads thought they were doing what was best for me but it only made me angry and confused.

 

I won't start on the oppressive system. The system that figured the only way to deal with me was by drugging me with $&!# that made me feel like a piece of $&!#.

 

Remnd me to talk to you about this again one day. I don't have it in me right now, but I wouldn't mind sharing at some point.

 

FWIW, my militant stepdad scared the living $&!# out of me as a kid. So I feel your issues with being intimidated as a child. I got no love for that type of behavior

Who ever thought that giving drugs (Ritalin for example) to kids was a good idea should have been force fed those same drugs for a year before any child took a single pill.  

[Tre Mac]

Guys we all been there, meet a nice lady things escalate you go back to her house and then the eyes.... of her cat starring at you.  I hate having sex in front of pets.

[AV.]

On 9/3/2019 at 4:57 PM, ChenWei91 said:

I don't remember who any of you people are.

Been a while, how are you?

[Master 112]

I am Malcolm X, and the psychiatrist is my White Man.

 

I didn't think for a long time that I had it in me to truly hate, but I've developed scorching ire for anyone who is a mental health practitioner. The short of it is that they are reprehensible people, and the long of it I'm not allowed to post here.

[riffraff]

On 9/12/2019 at 11:44 AM, Tre Mac said:

Guys we all been there, meet a nice lady things escalate you go back to her house and then the eyes.... of her cat starring at you.  I hate having sex in front of pets.

Oh man don’t even get me started.

Edited September 14, 2019 by riffraff

[luckylager]

23 hours ago, 112 said:

I am Malcolm X, and the psychiatrist is my White Man.

 

I didn't think for a long time that I had it in me to truly hate, but I've developed scorching ire for anyone who is a mental health practitioner. The short of it is that they are reprehensible people, and the long of it I'm not allowed to post here.

I think you'd enjoy reading "manufacturing victims".

[ReggieBush]

Saw my a picture of my ex with her new bf today. We ended amicably due to circumstances out of our control, non the less, it re-opened wounds. 

[Ashleigh]

I really like the show Blindspot and if I could scream it from the mountaintops, I would. But for now, I will tell all of you lovely people. 

[Master 112]

1 minute ago, Ashleigh said:

I really like the show Blindspot and if I could scream it from the mountaintops, I would. But for now, I will tell all of you lovely people. 

where did u go all these years?