Sultan of Sarcasm

I guess when you disappear for a couple of years things are bound to change...unless it's CDC!

Is this thing on?

Leaving with a sick feeling in my gut.

I get why it happens, but every time Stealth nukes a thread that's just getting good, a little part of me dies.

And I know what I have to do now. I gotta keep breathing. Because tomorrow the sun will rise. Who knows what the tide could bring?

I'm going to try sitting at home for a couple weeks to see if my boss will give me a $200k raise.

Hamburgers! The cornerstone of any nutritious breakfast. What kind of hamburgers?

Alright, I won't bother you about it any more.

Look, I've always liked you, but take a hint. I'm not going to talk about it. It's her story to tell.

Deleting my comments? Was it really that bad that you need to keep it secret?

If I wanted a joke, I'd follow you into the john and watch you take a leak. Now are you gonna help me or are you gonna stand there like a slab of meat with mittens?

Don't let me stand in your way, please don't let me stand in your way. The last thing I want to be remembered as is an annoying blabbermouth... You know, nothing grinds my gears worse than some chowderhead that doesn't know when to keep his big trap shut... If you catch me running off with my mouth, just give me a poke on the chubbs...

Your life is defined by opportunities...even the ones you miss.

Hey bud, how ya doin'?