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About this blog

Sarcasm/Satire Hockey Blog

Entries in this blog

Juice/Guzzler and the Anaheim Puzzler

Reblogged from: https://narwhalhockey.wordpress.com Hint: There’s no puzzle, that was just to lure you in, and it rhymed. Anyways… Look out Anaheim, California! Or shall we say, look out National Hockey League. GOOD friends Ryan Kesler and Kevin Bieksa have been reunited in Anaheim and are poised to have a strong season. Adding these two players to the team gives The Ducks two more players. In doing so, The Ducks have also made themselves immune to things such as smaller/inferior NHLers, Mic

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Keslerific

Secret Agent Antoine Vermette and the Merkley Mystery

Reblogged from: https://narwhalhockey.wordpress.com For as long as they have been in the league, the Coyotes have been an underdog team. Year in and year out nobody expects anything from them, and year in and year out they deliver nothing as expected. It's safe to say at this point the fans know what they aren’t getting. The only great season they have really had thus far was in the 2012-13 season where they somehow made the playoffs and shocked the Chicago Blackhawks (If this was Tampa I cou

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Keslerific

Lawson Crouse - Draft Steal

Reblogged from - https://narwhalhockey.wordpress.com Every once in a while a players falls in the draft and becomes a steal. This year the Florida Panthers pulled off the heist of the century when they drafted a 6’4 215 lb Canadian man beast with the 11th overall pick. The other teams were afraid they could not tame such raw power, but the Panthers took a courageous chance and The Crouse is now theirs to unleash on a frightened National Hockey league. The Panthers probably thought they were ju

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Keslerific

Jagr and The Magic Mullet

Reblogged from: [url="https://narwhalhockey.wordpress.com"]https://narwhalhockey.wordpress.com[/url]   [color=rgb(102,102,102)][font='Roboto Slab'][size=5]We're back, Jack! I hope Jack Eichel reads this, because that would be a perfect intro to this blog. Or Jack Johnson, or Jack Hillen, or zombie Jack Adams, because it's almost Halloween and it would be very fitting if he read this and ate my brains.[/size][/font][/color]  [color=rgb(102,102,102)][font='Roboto Slab'][size=5] The regular sea

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Keslerific

Washington Cupitals

Reblogged from: https://narwhalhockey.wordpress.com I hate puns but couldn’t think of anything better. This week I got followed by former NHL enforcer and current vegan Georges Laraque on Twitter. The Green Men, and Carolina Hurricanes player Zach Boychuk also followed me recently (they follow everyone, I’m not special) and I thought I should finally plug my twitter on my next blog, which is now. It’s just @NarwhalHockey I should also finally start this blog off, which is now. Wha

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Evil Zach Senyshyn

Reblogged from: https://narwhalhockey.wordpress.com Narwhal Hockey is back by unpopular demand! (1 person (me)) lets get through the dreaded off season together and have a laugh. This week we have a double shot that features a couple of Nathan Gerbe size mini blogs. Blog 1 Zach Senyshyn - The NHLs Youngest Assistant GM Suck it, Dubas. I didnt know much about Zach Senyshyn or Boston GM Don Sweeney up until the draft, and even thought his (Dons) last name was McSweeney. It wasnt until afte

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Dustin Penners Pancake Peril

Reblogged from: https://narwhalhockey.wordpress.com Pancakes never hurt anyone, except Dustin Penner. It all started three years ago. A delicious stack of pancakes was made by Penners then wife, Jessica. Dustin couldn’t wait to devour them (the pancakes, you knew that). He quickly hunched over to eat them and felt something go in his back, mid chew. He corrected his posture as a cascade of butter and syrup slowly ran down his face, he knew that he was hurt. Dustin went to the LA Kings traine

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