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A New Game, Texans and My Voodoo Sucks - JAN.09.08

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Mike the Yankee

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<table width=90%><tr><td><img src=http://cdn.nhl.com/canucks/images/upload/2007/07/mikeblog.gif border=0 align=left hspace=4 vspace=1>A few random musings from the dude's who's life has finally settled to a point where he can direct most of his gerbil-like attention back to the only sport and team that matters.

"Killing Me Softly with His Blues"

-Lori Lieberman

I play a little mental game when the Canucks are in a shootout and I encourage you to try it. It's called "Oh no, I'm Roberto Luongo in a shootout!" Here's how you play: pretend you have to be perfect enough for Linden to score once. If you mess up though, then you have to pray to various deities that anyone else can score so you can escape with two points. Here's the trick though: no cursing. None at all. Is that Crosby barreling down on you? Tough, keep it PG mister. Try it, it's quite hard. Imagine having to go six rounds exclaiming "ahh fiddlesticks!" while waiting for Edler of all guys to score. And, after you play it, you can appreciate Luongo's contribution to the team even more and will make your mom proud simultaneously.

<a href=http://cdn.nhl.com/canucks/images/upload/2007/12/dec0807_canuckvspenguin05_b.jpg target=_blank><img src=http://cdn.nhl.com/canucks/images/upload/2007/12/dec0807_canuckvspenguin05_t.jpg border=0 align=right hspace=4 vspace=1></a>

I GOT A LOT OF PROBLEMS WITH YOU PEOPLE!

- Frank Costanza during Festivus

My apologies, after years in a university and multiple internships, I really thought my voodoo skills were far more acute when I unleashed them on Calgary in the offseason. I truly felt my ability to mind warp their management into hiring Keenan would cause a biblical meltdown (you know, sort of like the one we saw a few years ago?) and we could all chuckle mightily at them. Kiprusoff getting yanked after one goal, Huselius would be reduced to sucking his thumb and clutching a blanket under the bench and Iginla's groin would take more abuse then Britney Spear's mind. But nooo...there they are messing around with the Northwest lead with Vancouver. I will hit the books much more over the coming weeks I promise. Fingers and chicken legs = crossed.

“You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans”

- George Carlin

It’s almost sacrilegious to request everyone root for a team in Texas, but this one doesn’t have Turco, Nagy or an aggressively hideous third jersey. Please root for the Cowboys on Sunday against the Giants; there’s nothing more funny then watching my city of Manhattan get all moody when sporting outcomes don’t go their way. And we have a few more months until A-rod makes an appearance anyway, so an NFL letdown will warm me at night until the Rangers get disqualified from the post season. And then you’re all invited for free drinks on me*.

<a href=http://cdn.nhl.com/canucks/images/upload/2007/11/nov2307_blues08_b.jpg target=_blank><img src=http://cdn.nhl.com/canucks/images/upload/2007/11/nov2307_blues08_t.jpg border=0 align=left hspace=4 vspace=1></a>

You're Mr. Lebowski. I'm the Dude. So that's what you call me. You know, that or, uh, His Dudeness, or uh, Duder, or El Duderino if you're not into the whole brevity thing.

- The Big Lebowski

Quietly lost in the season so far is Alex Burrows is on pace to smash his career totals in goals and points and has already surpassed his career best in assists, shorthanded goals (leads the team) and game winning goals. Not bad for a dude who is 16th on the team in in TOI/G and bounces between the third and fourth lines. Having agitators who can provide some offense and special teams help is what I believed helped that Disney team get a Cup.

* = Note I didn’t say what kind of drink, so no funny faces when I hand you a Sunny Delight or a Shirley Temple.

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