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Monty

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Everything posted by Monty

  1. Sin City: A Dame to Kill For - 2/10 I really enjoyed the first one, but this wasn't even laughably bad, it was torture. Don't watch.
  2. You know that feeling you get when you watch a terrible movie? Have fun watching Melancholia.
  3. Don't watch it, it is nearly unbearable. I watched about 20 minutes, rolled my eyes the entire time, and decided to watch reruns of Star Trek TNG instead.
  4. I still feel that Nolan's idea/story would have been better suited as a 10 part miniseries. He had so much going on that it was too difficult to cram it all into a 3 hour film And I liked Prometheus. It was fun.
  5. Godzilla (2014) - 7.5/10 Not going to be a long review. I love a decent monster film. For the most part, this was a lot of fun. Some disappointing parts, which people have already mentioned. Otherwise, a lot of fun.
  6. Can honestly say I will never watch Boyhood. I've only seen 5 Linklater films, only two of which he wrote: - Dazed and Confused - Suburbia - School of Rock - Bad News Bears - Bernie Just no desire to see it.
  7. I found out what they were because Chelsea Peretti and Scott Aukerman were making fun of them on Comedy Bang Bang. If it weren't for that, I would still have no clue what they were.
  8. To me, there may not be a show more overrated than Clam Oz.
  9. Haven't read Haunted, so can't say anything about it. Read Lullaby over ten years ago. I remember being underwhelmed.
  10. Until about 2 months ago, I didn't know what an "emoji" was.
  11. So, I've decided that whenever I want to rate a television show, I'm going to come here to do it. I don't think a thread dedicated to rating television shows would garner enough interest. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Garfunkel and Oates - 1.5/10 I sort of reviewed this a few pages back, but it was an incredibly short review about how awful it is. Well, after watching all the episodes now, I feel as though I can give it a fair enough rating; and the fact that I actually sat through the entire season, means that I legitimately gave it a chance. So, for those of you who aren't aware, the Garfunkel and Oates female comedy/singing duel first came out, I believe, in 2007 on Youtube. Garfunkel (Riki Lindhome) and Oates (Kate Micucci) star as themselves, just living out their daily life in Los Angeles (I think). Now, it is incredibly difficult (if not impossible) to watch it without the inevitable comparison to Flight of the Conchords. For those of you who have not seen FOTC, it followed Bret McKenzie and Jemaine Clement as a New Zealand singing duo, who have immigrated to New York City to try and make it in the music industry. The great thing about FOTC, was that in the shows reality, they were absolutely terrible musicians; but when the show did break to a fantasy musical number, you were absolutely floored by not only how talented Bret and Jemaine were as musicians, but also how incredibly funny and clever their lyrics were, nailing whatever genre they were poking fun at. In Garfunkel and Oates, you're not quite sure what the purpose or direction of the show is. Riki and Kate star as a fictionalized version of themselves. So you do follow them to comedy clubs, once in a while, and you get the sense that they are actually semi-popular (just like in real life). So, when the show cuts to the duo's "fantasy numbers" (like in Flight of the Conchords), there really isn't any special about it, except that you get to hear one of their songs; which, I might add, are not funny either. And this is where the show really misfires. I'm not quite sure if I'm the intended audience, or if the show is just genuinely terrible. I'm inclined to think that it is the latter, due to the fact that I love musical comedy (FOTC, Weird Al' circa 1980) and the fact that I decided to stick out the entire season and watch all 8 episodes. There's just very little humour going on here. I may have laughed in 2 episodes, which happened to have quest starred TJ Miller (Silicon Valley, etc) and then Kumail Nanjiani (Silicon Valley, Portlandia); however, I'm also inclined to think there was forced laughter there, because I really like both comedians. As for the acting/comedic talents of Riki and Kate, the two are polar opposites. Riki is the "sexy one" (yeah, I know) who has more relationship problems, while Kate acts and is written to mirror her appearance, which is that of a child who has never grown up. Riki Lindhome is absolutely brutal in her role. Perhaps this is because she is written (she and Kate write the show) to be the "sexy one". I have a difficult time believing she is like this is real life, as she is not very attractive; so channeling stereotypical "pretty girl" problems is not something I believe she knows how to do. Because of this, she then has to "act" the part, and you see just how terrible of an actress she actually is. She is definitely the dead weight between the two. Considering how awful the writting is on the show, Kate Micucci does a very good job with her role. Again, she's not really funny, but she is definitely doing her best to make her screen time watchable. I can definitely see her having a solid career on tv and in film as one of the friends (3rd/4th billing). Would be perfectly fine in supporting roles. Maybe the show needs another season after getting it's feet wet; but I wouldn't bank on IFC taking another chance on this clunker.
  12. My wife started watching 'Life As We Know It', so I decided to leave the room and watch... Event Horizon - 3/10 Even dumber than I remember.
  13. Interstellar - Should have been a miniseries/10 So much going on that Nolan's idea/story would have better off had it been told over a 10 part series. I really can't rate it.
  14. Watching it tonight with the wife. I'll post my review tomorrow.
  15. On the way to work this morning I was listening to Bjork. It's the album that sounds like a bunch of whales mating (yes, all her albums).
  16. Kaminski's cinematography on "Cool As Ice" was breathtaking.
  17. Rescue Dawn was ruined by the freeze frame at the end. To me, nothing ruins movies more then the dredded freeze frame. Unless it's Sleepaway Camp. Then it's amazing.
  18. Malhotra: 13 games played 0 points -3 Personally, I'd rather have a player with two working eyes on the team.
  19. Or, instead of a movie, you could go all out and watch 'Band of Brothers'. Otherwise, I would suggest 'Black Book' from director Paul Verhoeven. Terrific foreign film.
  20. Was going to say the exact same thing. Ambien, look at statistics (which I won't look up because I'm currently on my work computer). While it is true that fewer women "get off" from intercourse alone, many women do "get off" from oral, just like many "get off" from manual stimulation. There is no "majority" in this, though. Also, I never said I was an "educated expert". Educated? Yes. Expert? No, I'm not a clinical counsellor. It's a hobby
  21. Last response and then I'm done, as I hate derailing threads. I'll keep this as short as I can. 1. Wife and I both double majored in university, one of majors was Psychology. 2. My wife's focus in Psychology was Behavioral Psych, while mine was Human Sexuality (my mother was a Marriage Counsellor who focused on Human Sexuality). 3. There are many sex books, quite a few my wife and I own, which refer to "Appetizers and Main Courses". This is not new concept. Most popular/well known book for this is "The Joy of Sex". Porn didn't come up with the concept.
  22. Ok, so I'm definitely not keeping time, but I know we spend quite a bit of time, as it takes my wife a while to "get started". But yes, you are absolutely right. There are definitely appropriate times for the "quickie". Anyways, as you said, this thread took a turn, and definitely one that was not needed either. I'll take responsibility for that. Onwards to more confessions.
  23. Not jealous at all, I think it's funny because I know spending "up to 2 hours on oral" is, as FramingDragon pretty much said, "It's an appetizer, not the main course." Absolutely no jealously or inferiority complex. Wife and I have, like many people, have married couple friends and we know what the "norm" is. A lot of married couples with or without kids, once married for a number of years, might have sex 2-3 times per month, quite a few are in completely sexless marriages. Whether this is because of time or complete lack of intimacy, it would be different for every marriage. Thankfully, my wife and I are not in that scenario. For us, after 11 years of marriage, we know we're fortunate to still be having sex anywhere between 2-4 per week. And if we're spending about an hour to an hour and a half each time, that's a lot of time, considering many marriages have little to none. Also, I'm not Mormon, but why should that matter for not watching porn? Have I in the past? Sure. Do I still? No. Why don't I? Aside from the cliche'd "Because I love and respect my wife", the other reason is because I have no desire to.
  24. 30 minutes = enough time for oral, yes. Again, 2 hours is completely unnecessary. Even married people without kids (me and my wife) don't have time for a 3 hour session when all is said and done. 1 hour session, absolutely; which, I might add, is infinitely more then what most married couples either a. Can afford to spend; or b. Are willing to spend. My wife and I get to bed at 10pm most nights. For example, I'll use yesterday as an example: 1. Pick my wife up at work at 7pm 2. Bring dinner that I already made with me so she could eat on the way home 3. Once home at 7:15pm, quickly let the dogs out and put them back in their kennels for the evening so my wife and I can spend the next 3 hours "making the beast with two backs". 4. Forget about talking to my wife and catching up on her day, who cares? 5. Forget about chores, dishes, laundry. I'll wait until tomorrow. 6. Doing the budget? Who cares? 1 hour is not only more then enough, it is more then what majority of married couples allot their time to.
  25. First: To each there own. Second: Yes, two hours is completely unnecessary. Third: I don't know what pron emulates, I'm married and could care less. Fourth: 30 minutes is easily enough time. It's about quality, not quantity. Fifth: After 11 years of marriage, and I've said this in another thread, my wife's and my sex life is 1000x better then it was 11 years ago.
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