"How the &^@# is this $&!# even real? Retired?! I never reached my full potential because all 11 coaches and GMs were so &^@#ing stupid and had no idea how to use my unbelievable skill. I was the best player to never be used properly. It's a huge conspiracy and I'm gonna sue the league for black balling me from any awards. &^@# you NHL. I'm gonna be a coach and show all these idiots how to use high end players and win cups. Stupid $&!#ty &^@#ing clowns with big dumb shoes and stupid hair.
I DESERVED BETTER!"
(Thanks for hosting, Toews. I had fun with my CAP)