SuperGarfield Posted April 4, 2012 Share Posted April 4, 2012 I am 16, and currently live with my mom. We live in a house 25 minutes away from the high school I attend, meanwhile my father lives about an hour away from my school. My mother is unable to pick me up until 3 hours after my school ends due to her work. On top of that I have a commitment to a school sport, with practices occurring 4 out of the 5 school days per week (half of them start at the time my mom would pick me up after work.) I go almost 8 hours without a proper meal at home on days like these. Not to mention my parents expect me to have high grades and eventually attend a good university, so homework time is cut into. Last but not least my sleep is deprived, and my mom expects me to begin driving to school when I get my drivers license. As I recall, driving when you're tired is dangerous. However, there is a solution. My father's parents are open to moving to the city where I go to school, meaning I would live with them and be able to come home each day after school within 10 minutes; as well as getting to school within that time frame. This is only a dream shattered by my disagreeing mother. She is reluctant to the idea, firmly stating we have a routine. I am frustrated and unsure of what I should do. It is clear to me I need to move to the city where I have my school, sports, and friends. I believe part of the reason she will not let me live with my grandparents is because she will no longer receive money for child support. She hasn't bought me a single piece of clothing in over a year, but does pay for my school and home. The amount of food given is weak, and I do not even have a place to do my homework besides my room even with the fact that my house is of good size. I feel like I am stuck with no options. Is it possible for me to choose to live with my dad, and then move into the city with his parents? I would not even mind seeing both parents on the weekends. Please help. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GodzillaDeuce Posted April 4, 2012 Share Posted April 4, 2012 aren't there any buses where you live? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperGarfield Posted April 4, 2012 Author Share Posted April 4, 2012 None connecting the cities Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CanuckRow Posted April 4, 2012 Share Posted April 4, 2012 aren't there any buses where you live? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Armada Posted April 4, 2012 Share Posted April 4, 2012 I'm sorry it happened to you but If my parents ever got divorced, I would have put them through the biggest guilt trip in my life. Probably wouldn't even talk to the one who had the original idea of getting divorced. If you really feel your mom is keeping you and restricting you out of her own greed then I say its time to go to your much better father and grand parents. Its pathetic how a couple cannot solve their differences anymore like adults. This day and age, more people get divorced than married, pretty sickening. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GodzillaDeuce Posted April 4, 2012 Share Posted April 4, 2012 I'm sorry it happened to you but If my parents ever got divorced, I would have put them through the biggest guilt trip in my life. Probably wouldn't even talk to the one who had the original idea of getting divorced. Its pathetic how a couple cannot solve their differences anymore like adults. This day and age, more people get divorced than mirage, pretty sickening. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Haikara Posted April 4, 2012 Share Posted April 4, 2012 Tough luck mate. Can only recommend you to learn to cook for yourself so you don't starve =( Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
250Integra Posted April 4, 2012 Share Posted April 4, 2012 Sorry to hear about that. My suggestion is to have a meeting with both of your parents and then express your concerns to them. If they love you and want what's best for you then they'll figure out the best solution. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GodzillaDeuce Posted April 4, 2012 Share Posted April 4, 2012 That's what you get from that entire paragraph? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Armada Posted April 4, 2012 Share Posted April 4, 2012 I know it takes you forever to get home and you're in sports but maybe getting a job where your school is or near your school can help so you also have your own income and then don't have to wait 3 hours sitting around doing nothing. It'll be tough to balance it in but its better than doing nothing during that time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
diesel_3 Posted April 4, 2012 Share Posted April 4, 2012 Seems like rock and a hard place, I would go with the Dad option and ask to live with his folks close to the school because of your current living situation getting in the way of your studies and activities. Good luck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morrissex95 Posted April 4, 2012 Share Posted April 4, 2012 Dude, don't complain about the car and being sleep deprived. I'm assuming they're offering to pay the $2000+ for car insurance and for the vehicle. Otherwise, you don't have to pay for anything that you don't want to. It's pretty simple. As for the sleep deprived issue, I'm assuming you're not smoking dope because you're an athlete so you've got a simple solution. 1) Go to the Pharmacy and buy some melatonin. Take as many as you need to get to sleep 2) If that doesn't work, go to your physician and get some heavy duty stuff. I'm speaking from personal experience with insomnia, I'm not actually a physician. I'm also 16 years old and my parents both work until around 6-7 PM(Lawyers) I'm also too way too old for a nanny. If you're hungry, cook some Chicken/Steak/Eggs/Kraft Dinner/Sandwich or learn how to cook yourself. I cook all those food items listed above all the time for myself. It usually tastes like arse, but if you're hungry, you'll eat! Pretty simple. If you really think your mom is an incompetent caregiver or if it's a situation dangerous to your physical/mental health, there's nothing stopping you from defying her and moving in with your grandparents. Under British Columbia Law, you are legally entitled to seek "emancipation" from your parents or move into a Teen Shelter. Believe me, I've looked into it. It sounds like you've got some issues with your mother. I'd say your best course of action would be moving in with your Grandparents. They sound pretty generous and quite frankly you're too old to be told where to live. If you think you've found a situation that's better for you in the long run, there is nothing stopping you from making an adult decision. You do understand that your mother has no leverage here legally, right? Everything you said above would be enough to give your grandparents custody. Seeking emancipation would be idiotic, by the way. First of all, these people are offering to buy you a car. If you're so concerned for your physical health while driving, stop playing sports and you won't be as tired. Having a car during high school is cool. You get to be cool! Congratulations! Second of all, there's only 2 1/2 more years until you're legally an adult. If you really think moving in with your Grandparents is the best idea, then all you have to do is move in with them. It's really not as big as you're making it. If your mother won't back down, stay persistent. This might be the beginning of your manhood. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Special Ed Posted April 4, 2012 Share Posted April 4, 2012 Here's your first option: don't listen to CDC. They don't know you or your situation. As well as your parents. The best person to ask is yourself. I would talk to both parents and then take some time to go with your instinct. And I didn't even have to read that block of text to help you kid. Good luck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GM Posted April 4, 2012 Share Posted April 4, 2012 I think a school counselor would be helpful or a professional of some sort. It sounds like there are some deep issues with your family (maybe not as bad as my friends was) that need to be communicated to each other. Like a previous poster said it's impossibe for anyone to give you proper advice without knowing you and your family. Hopefully you can manage to be positive and get through this tough time! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Redacted Posted April 4, 2012 Share Posted April 4, 2012 it seems like it would solve all his problems? I was raised by a single mother that worked 9-5, and I took the bus to and from school and learned to cook for myself if it was necessary. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rey Posted April 4, 2012 Share Posted April 4, 2012 Get a part time job. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stawns Posted April 4, 2012 Share Posted April 4, 2012 I think a school counselor would be helpful or a professional of some sort. It sounds like there are some deep issues with your family (maybe not as bad as my friends was) that need to be communicated to each other. Like a previous poster said it's impossibe for anyone to give you proper advice without knowing you and your family. Hopefully you can manage to be positive and get through this tough time! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
silverpig Posted April 4, 2012 Share Posted April 4, 2012 Sounds like the grandparents are a good option. Also, try learning how to cook. You can do some pretty good things that are very simple and don't take long. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Armada Posted April 4, 2012 Share Posted April 4, 2012 Have you guys after thought that cooking might not be the problem but rather his mom doesn't buy proper food... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Perfect From Now On Posted April 4, 2012 Share Posted April 4, 2012 I'm sorry it happened to you but If my parents ever got divorced, I would have put them through the biggest guilt trip in my life. Probably wouldn't even talk to the one who had the original idea of getting divorced. If you really feel your mom is keeping you and restricting you out of her own greed then I say its time to go to your much better father and grand parents. Its pathetic how a couple cannot solve their differences anymore like adults. This day and age, more people get divorced than married, pretty sickening. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.