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Does she like me?


Dazzle

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You guys need to have a conversation about this.

When she talks about her boyfriend sometimes over the phone, you need to tell her hows the relationship status between the two, how it's been going, and is she happy with him currently if she's willing to say those things. One things for sure, if she attached to her boyfriend, you'll have to back off a little and just take things as a 'friend zone' environment.

However if she isn't 100% attached to her boyfriend, this could be your chance to ask her some of her doubts about him or things that haven't really worked out. If she's calling you before bed time and you guys are talking over the phone, at least 20 minutes of this conversation would be ideal if you really want to find out if she's still into her boyfriend, or you.

Usually when a girl calls a guy before bed time and you end up talking to each other for nearly an hour or two, then who knows, she might find you as someone to talk to better than her current boyfriend. It may be that she finds something in you that she doesn't find with her current boyfriend and you need to take some sort of an advantage to reel her in, if you know what I mean ;)

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This is the backstory.

We have known each other for a long time, but only recently (about 2-3 weeks ago) reconnected, despite seeing each other (rarely) at family parties. We played when we were kids once - and I do have regrets that we did it more often than just that.

From the last baby shower party, we talked again. We texted each other - and now, it's become a lot more regular.

She's also the type to talk on the phone, so we've been doing that, talking for 1-2 hrs almost every night before we sleep.

The problem is, she has a boyfriend - and she namedrops him A LOT (i.e. my bf does this/my bf does that, etc)

YET...

I think she's flirting with me too.

- She hints that her bf is different from her.

- She thinks our personalities are near identical (we also did a personality test for kicks and we had the same rating)

- She calls me nicknames

- She admits that she was nervous talking to me because of various reasons

We've seen each other once, privately, but we were only playing card games.

Other than that, she hasn't asked me to come see her (in any shape or form). I've suggested a drink or two, but she hasn't taken me up on those offers.

Friendzoned or something more?

I think the phone call thing is a bit amiss - I bet she doesn't do this with her bf. So... maybe, I'm that guy that she bitches to - when she's not with her bf. In other words, I am hopelessly friendzoned.

Dude...this isn't Alabama...you're gonna seriously be in trouble if this goes anywhere. Even the hottest cousin is huge NO-NO!

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If she is hiding how she interacts with you from her boyfriend then she may have an interest but if she is open about you with him then she likely doesn't. Basically she will show her intent to you through others by if she sees you as harmless or if she is acting guilty as if she is doing something wrong.

However don't make faulty leaps of logic as all of those things doesn't mean she is interested. For example my best friend is engaged and has nicknames for me. I also have more in common with her than her fiance who I almost never speak to and for stretches I will talk to her far more than he does and she has no problem complaining to me about him. We often get mistaken for a couple and she is fine getting physically close as in literally snuggling with me in the same bed. This is her specific nature though and she doesn't hide it or how we interact from him and lets him read our conversation if he wishes. She simply sees me as a big brother so to her such behavior is not flirtatious.

Of course I know her significantly better than you know this girl but point remains the same about misreading. If you did misread and made a move you would likely end up in an ugly situation. Plus as said if a girl will cheat with you she will certainly cheat on you. Just keep getting to know her. If she is unhappy with her bf or happier with you then you will get your chance. The friendzone isn't something you can't get out of. You can be just friends with a girl for years then change the relationship. I was friends with one of my exes for 5 years and watched her date other guys and gave her advice etc before we ended up as a couple for a year.

Good luck. All is fair in love and war but try not to do anything to reckless xD girls who are still seeing someone often require patience.

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But seriously.... You gotta start testing her by saying stuff like "if you were to break up with your boyfriend....", or "if you are a single all the sudden....", or "if you were to start seeing someone else...."

If that line of conversation goes no where, leave.

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Looks to me like she's made you her "back burner" guy, a potential replacement for her current boyfriend if things go far enough sideways between them. My advice would be to try your hardest not to get hung up on this chick, dont let her get into your head because mind games are the enemy.

Dont dismiss her completely, keep doing your little phone chats if she initiates them, but go about your own business as though she doesn't even exist. Go out with other girls, hang out with your buddies, and basically just enjoy single life because sometimes having a girlfriend isn't all it's cracked up to be, sometimes it can be a royal pain in the ass.

I've been that guy who got totally hung up on a girl who was unavailable and at one point I actually ended up thinking I was in love with her. As it turned out, she was more or less just using me for the type of attention she wasn't getting from her boyfriend, and I was getting nowhere near where I wanted to be with her. That was even worse than getting friendzoned because as it turned out she wasn't any kind of friend at all. She knew how I felt about her and she continued to string me along despite that. Dont let the same thing happen to you because you'll just end up miserable and resenting the hell out of this girl.

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Ask her..you talk to her every night for 2 hours..just bring it up..do I have a shot with you..if she says no I have a BF..move on..get to the heart of the matter and get the answer..might not be the one you want but at least you will know.

Or "can I put a shot in you?"

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I'm not sure why so many of the posters want you to play games, or drop hints, or take it slow, or whatever. Be an adult. Just ask her if she's interested in being more than friends. No point in beating around the bush.

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