Twilight Sparkle Posted May 12, 2015 Share Posted May 12, 2015 so like, i had a pretty sucky couple of days at work, for personal reasons, so my coworkers all noticed that my head isn't in the game and all urged me to stay behind after my shift to have a drink at first i didn't really want to. i just wanted to come home and browse facebook and cdc like a loser, liking a couple funny things by mrtechnicaldifficult, and dudeholdmybeer, and commenting-giving encouraging words to a friend who's one of THOSE PEOPLE who constantly fish for attention, and liking AJ's 5,000th photo of her cat, then giving my two cents on airmchair gming... jk, i suck at being an armchair gm so i decide to stay after my shift, then, lo and behold, i'm sitting at the bar, alone, while everyone's conversing with regulars and i'm left looking up at the tv's and watching some kind of bike race. i finish my beer, and leave, without anyone even noticing that i was even there TLDR: friends invite you to party. come, they said, it'll be fun, they said. you're ignored and just wasted your time share your feels. we've all been there Link to comment
thejazz97 Posted May 12, 2015 Share Posted May 12, 2015 Grade 12 was hard for me... was either forgotten about or passed on to be someone else's friend. Turned me from an extrovert to an introvert... Only have two friends that I still hang out with more than once in a blue moon. Link to comment
LuckyLuciano Posted May 12, 2015 Share Posted May 12, 2015 Get off the prescription meds and start to weed. Link to comment
Argon Posted May 12, 2015 Share Posted May 12, 2015 My ex broke up with me two weeks before last Christmas, three weeks before our third year together. Had already bought and wrapped her Christmas and anniversary presents, and luckily didn't book the vacation I was surprise planning for us. A week before I happened, we were looking at places to move out together, and nearly signed before she suddenly had a change of heart.. Worst part is, I got over her after a couple months, but still not over losing her family...was really good friends with her brothers, and her grandparents were more like mine then my own Link to comment
Sergei Shirokov Posted May 12, 2015 Share Posted May 12, 2015 I never really understood the appeal of bars. It always really loud so it's hard to have a conversation, the drinks are ridiculously expensive, and the waiting to pay/get served is always annoying. I can see it being okay in groups of 3-4. People say it's a great place to pick up and mingle, but I rarely see this happen. Usually people go in groups and just stick to their groups. Link to comment
Heretic Posted May 12, 2015 Share Posted May 12, 2015 Sorry you've had a rough day. As far as being alone at the bar - that's up to you (IMHO) to go an mingle, or chat with your co-workers. Reach out and take it. Link to comment
Phil_314 Posted May 12, 2015 Share Posted May 12, 2015 Sorry you've had a rough day. As far as being alone at the bar - that's up to you (IMHO) to go an mingle, or chat with your co-workers. Reach out and take it. +1; also how was your mood at the bar, OP? As well-meaning as your friends were, I think the reality of those situations is that, unless it's just the 2 or 3 of you there and that it was established as a venting session between close friends (which it doesn't seem like since they were happy to chat with other regulars), people generally head to Ye Olde Waterin' Hole to have a good time themselves and they would've hoped that you would join so that in their conversation it would've taken your mind off of things and you would've been open to having a good time with them. Thing is, when they see that you're not ready to have fun with them in their banter or whatever and it's a Friday or Saturday night, their attention would eventually migrate to others who are like-minded and open to that revelry, and having had experiences like that and learned from them, I wouldn't say it's entirely their fault to have done what they did. Beer is a relaxant, and there's a reason why the both stereotypical party people and booze are in the same place, it's so that the two can mix and the customers can let loose. I'm sometimes still guilty of being overly reserved at bars myself, but hope you'd also learn to leave the baggage (physical and otherwise) at the door and relax with them for a night. You'd hopefully feel better and your friends would appreciate it. $0.02 Link to comment
Lil B From The Pack Posted May 12, 2015 Share Posted May 12, 2015 TS you turning babyface. You should cement your turn by giving all them dudes the Stone Cold Stunner. Link to comment
-AJ- Posted May 12, 2015 Share Posted May 12, 2015 You seriously need better friends. There are few things such as friends who are loyal to the end and put your needs above their own. Link to comment
Gross-Misconduct Posted May 12, 2015 Share Posted May 12, 2015 You seriously need better friends. There are few things such as friends who are loyal to the end and put your needs above their own. He said coworkers. Not friends. Link to comment
Qwags Posted May 12, 2015 Share Posted May 12, 2015 It's okay, TS. I'll be your friend. Link to comment
Twilight Sparkle Posted May 12, 2015 Author Share Posted May 12, 2015 My ex broke up with me two weeks before last Christmas, three weeks before our third year together. Had already bought and wrapped her Christmas and anniversary presents, and luckily didn't book the vacation I was surprise planning for us. A week before I happened, we were looking at places to move out together, and nearly signed before she suddenly had a change of heart.. Worst part is, I got over her after a couple months, but still not over losing her family...was really good friends with her brothers, and her grandparents were more like mine then my own that's the worst homie, once you're in with the family, you'd think you guys are pretty set I never really understood the appeal of bars. It always really loud so it's hard to have a conversation, the drinks are ridiculously expensive, and the waiting to pay/get served is always annoying. I can see it being okay in groups of 3-4. People say it's a great place to pick up and mingle, but I rarely see this happen. Usually people go in groups and just stick to their groups. i kinda sorta work in one xD my coworkers are all cool, but trying to sit and chat with server staff is almost impossible, unless you're a drunk pretty girl. i'm drunk and pretty but no girl D: +1; also how was your mood at the bar, OP? As well-meaning as your friends were, I think the reality of those situations is that, unless it's just the 2 or 3 of you there and that it was established as a venting session between close friends (which it doesn't seem like since they were happy to chat with other regulars), people generally head to Ye Olde Waterin' Hole to have a good time themselves and they would've hoped that you would join so that in their conversation it would've taken your mind off of things and you would've been open to having a good time with them. Thing is, when they see that you're not ready to have fun with them in their banter or whatever and it's a Friday or Saturday night, their attention would eventually migrate to others who are like-minded and open to that revelry, and having had experiences like that and learned from them, I wouldn't say it's entirely their fault to have done what they did. Beer is a relaxant, and there's a reason why the both stereotypical party people and booze are in the same place, it's so that the two can mix and the customers can let loose. I'm sometimes still guilty of being overly reserved at bars myself, but hope you'd also learn to leave the baggage (physical and otherwise) at the door and relax with them for a night. You'd hopefully feel better and your friends would appreciate it. $0.02 my mood at the bar was, i kinda wanted to go home but once you start your beer, you've reached the point of no return. i'll stay and converse with my coworkers after hours on like friday/saturday but i dont like being there too long after my shift, especially at 3 am when they finally start their cash out. i'll even help put away cups at the bar and wipe down their tables, just to help them out so they arent there until 4 in the morning. i can't exactly mingle with everyone else because i can't stand our clientele, because it's mostly industry people. i don't have a whole lot in common with stuck up servers D: i mostly ended up staying for the beer anyways, because staff discount generally, once my shift ends, i'm gone It's okay, TS. I'll be your friend. yay! Link to comment
-AJ- Posted May 12, 2015 Share Posted May 12, 2015 He said coworkers. Not friends. I suppose so, yes. Hopefully he has friends that are much better than his co-workers. Link to comment
Phil_314 Posted May 12, 2015 Share Posted May 12, 2015 my mood at the bar was, i kinda wanted to go home but once you start your beer, you've reached the point of no return. i'll stay and converse with my coworkers after hours on like friday/saturday but i dont like being there too long after my shift, especially at 3 am when they finally start their cash out. i'll even help put away cups at the bar and wipe down their tables, just to help them out so they aren't there until 4 in the morning. i can't exactly mingle with everyone else because i can't stand our clientele, because it's mostly industry people. i don't have a whole lot in common with stuck up servers D: i mostly ended up staying for the beer anyways, because staff discount generally, once my shift ends, i'm gone Hmm, if I were you I think I would've just asked if they wanted to go for drinks after work after the following shift (hopefully one that ends earlier, at another location (don't like to hang out where I work). Also, good on you for sticking it out and staying around to help, hope they'd appreciate it and be open to spending time with you outside work. Also, 3 AM is pretty darn late to be honest, and (were you tired?) if you were tired I think it'd be reasonable to want to head home. Part of the problem seems to be that you don't like the crowd where you work (lemme guess, some place like The Keg or Earls'?). Maybe try to get another job where you can serve people who you would be happy to talk to, say in a more homey restaurant? It'd be easier to talk with people when things are slow and chill and those kinds of business people wouldn't show up for drinks to a place like Denny's. Besides, not everyone's a mingler, and if you're not one don't force yourself, and even if you are one feel free to take breaks from that once in awhile, even the social animal needs a breather sometimes. Hope things work out for ya! Link to comment
Nucks4theCup. Posted May 12, 2015 Share Posted May 12, 2015 Trying out Tinder. Didn't get any matches for weeks. Met a qt3.14 there, my first match. I sent her a few messages asking about her life, aspirations. She was perfect. Agreed to go out and watch Avengers with me. My hands were so sweaty the whole time. I wanted to hold her hand. I tried and my hand slipped right off. She was disgusted. She didn't say anything to me afterwards. I really wanted to kiss her, man... Haven't spoken to her since but I can't stop thinking about her. Got a few more matches but none compare to her. Link to comment
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