Warhippy Posted January 6, 2016 Share Posted January 6, 2016 Ok. Let's dream here and live in this amazing alternate reality so many live in without any serious understanding on my part of Tamp'as respective cap issues outside of the 1 contract Setting the stage in Tampa, Stevie has not been able to trade Drouin, Stamkos is on the cusp of leaving unless he can be drowned with cash in a near tax free state and Yzerman desperately needs to shed serious cap doing it. Benning steps up to the plate in March and... To Tampa: Chris Tanev, 2016 5th and 2017 4th To Vancouver: Matt Carle (and his contract) Jonathan Drouin Tanev has opted out because it's Tampa frigging Bay BABY! Stevie Yzerman takes his new found cap space and signs Stamkos to the richest single contract in NHL History. Stamkos and Tanev become bros and bro hard on South Beach because...Bro Vancouver without that steadying presence on the blueline sinks to a dismal 29th in the league after Henrik slips in the dressing room on Matt Carles leftover sun tan lotion injuring his ankle and being out for the season rendering Carle the GOAT medal winner making Virtanen smile Vancouver wins the lottery (yay) and looks to make some serious play at the draft. Eye balling Arizona who has finished in the 3rd overall draft spot after Buffalo went on a possible cocaine fueled rampage int he last 3 weeks of the season and Doans Rocky Mountain fever spread through the Yotes locker room like Mono on a McCaan. Benning winds up and!!! Offers The 2016 1st overall, a 2018 2nd round pick and Alex Edler (who has been morose and crushed after losing bro-stafa Tanev to Bro Heim Stammer in Tampa) for Domi, OEL and the 2016 3rd overall pick. Broken down as such. Edler and 2018 2nd for Domi. 1st overall for 3rd overall and OEL. But wait...there's MOAR!!! edmonton of course has sucked, sucked like only they can suck so hard even die hard leafs fans are blown away by how much suck can come from such a sucky suckhole like Edmonton. benning weasels in and says pssst...Wanna tarde. The knockout blow comes!!!! Vancouver trades : OEL Edmonton Trades 2nd overall pick in 2016 to vancouver!!! Draft breaks down like this, Arizona drafts Matthews and starts selling tickets and merch making count Bettman crow with pleasure assuring everyone hockey in the south works. with the 2nd and 3rd overall picks vancouver drafts Puljujarvi and Laine from Finland who make Virtanen their immediate bro and now everyone has a bro to pal around with as Matthews and Edler chill like only Arizonans can do. Benning shakes up the various winnings from trade day deals including losing Burrows, Higgins, Hamhuis and manages to finagle a Fabbro out of the deal as well as a couple 2nd round picks to do what he will with. Benning then goes on to fill the holes left by Tanev and edler via free agency. The fins Fabbro Domi and the youth rampage across the NHL in the vancouver uni for the next decade and all retire wearing multiple cup rings personal and team hardware and benning gets a statue next to Roger and his towel on a stick and both bro out in statue form for all eternity forever enshrined in hockey history as frigging geniuses bro TLDR? Vancouver made a bucnh of unrealistic trades I drank to much coffee today and bro...dem trades though Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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