Jump to content
The Official Site of the Vancouver Canucks
Canucks Community

#MeToo going to far?


Dral

Recommended Posts

3 minutes ago, Warhippy said:

sadly...it isn't wrong and would be accepted as fact by most.  :(

Like I mean sometimes I wake up and like I think I look as good as Chris hemsworth and I totally am gonna talk to that girl I see at the park on Fridays but then sometimes I wake up and my hair like totally sucks and I'm like no way am I gonna talk to that girl because I'm not Chris hemsworth enough and she'll think I'm a creepy weirdo.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 minute ago, riffraff said:

Like I mean sometimes I wake up and like I think I look as good as Chris hemsworth and I totally am gonna talk to that girl I see at the park on Fridays but then sometimes I wake up and my hair like totally sucks and I'm like no way am I gonna talk to that girl because I'm not Chris hemsworth enough and she'll think I'm a creepy weirdo.

all bout the flo bro

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Why don't men and women hire a third party like an arbitrator or ombudsman type to bridge communication between the two parties?

 

the arbitrator can then say things like:  "he said he likes you but isn't sure if it's like like or just like so maybe give it time."

 

or:  "yep! You've got the green light to go ahead and get your freak on"

Link to comment
Share on other sites

6 minutes ago, riffraff said:

Why don't men and women hire a third party like an arbitrator or ombudsman type to bridge communication between the two parties?

 

the arbitrator can then say things like:  "he said he likes you but isn't sure if it's like like or just like so maybe give it time."

 

or:  "yep! You've got the green light to go ahead and get your freak on"

Soon we will be seeing the Dave chapelle consent skit in real life. 

 

Im just curious to see how far this movement goes. Wait till it breaks into marriages and husband and wives have to walk on egg shells to what they say to each other. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

15 minutes ago, riffraff said:

Why don't men and women hire a third party like an arbitrator or ombudsman type to bridge communication between the two parties?

 

the arbitrator can then say things like:  "he said he likes you but isn't sure if it's like like or just like so maybe give it time."

 

or:  "yep! You've got the green light to go ahead and get your freak on"

That used to be your best friend on the playground.

 

....and regarding sex, now there's an app for that...

http://www.cbc.ca/news/technology/metoo-consent-app-phone-sex-1.4493196

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

10 hours ago, Scottish⑦Canuck said:

Evidently not or we wouldn't even be discussing it.

 

I think it's more fair to say "We need to teach young women that regret is NOT rape" then to say "We need to teach young men that rape is not acceptable in today's society"

Link to comment
Share on other sites

10 hours ago, Jester13 said:

I mean this in the best way, but is it possible you weren't falsely accused but rather are unable to fully see where the women was coming from? 

 

For example, some people believe Ansari is being falsely accused, but he did something wrong: he tried to coerce the women into a situation she didn't want to be in. 

 

So if two reasonable consenting adults are out on a date, and one is invited back to the others home, what are the reasonable expectations of the encounter at home? In today's society and culture, I don't think it's outrageous at all to claim to expect some kind of sexual encounter... By all accounts, when he suggested a sexual act that she said no to - he did not force her to do it... and when he suggested a sexual act that she did NOT say no to, they did it... It desn't necessarily sound like he coerced her to do anything against her will - it sounds more like he asked if she wanted to do this (NO!)... ok, then how about this? (OK!)

 

Someone else mentioned Shapiro, but he put it completely bluntly and is totally true - Men are stupid and men are NOT mind readers,

 

If you asked 100 reasonable men, without this story being a background for context, just straight up "You go on a date with a woman, invite her back to your place, she comes willingly, she's the one who gave you her number in the first place, would you think DTF?"

 

100 reasonable men would answer yes.

 

 

 

At some point in time (and I know I'm going to be accused of victim blaming here), women need to take some responsibility for themselves, say no, get up and leave. Staying, and engaging in other sexual acts is a strong verbal cue that you want some action too...

 

 

If you do not want to have any intimate contact with someone you gave your number too, then went on a date with... DO NOT GO BACK TO THEIR HOME... that is the only strong non-verbal cue you can give that absolutely means no.

 

 

10 hours ago, Jester13 said:

I think lots of men cross the line and don't know it. There's a belief out there that women need to be coerced into sex because they hold all the cards. 

I think women and society in general have not actually defined that line - it's still blurry... and both men and women are guilty of crossing that line (men, by actual sexual assault, and women by claiming sexual assault when no such thing happened)...

 

Until that line is actually clearly defined - we're going to have a problem, and I think most good, honest men (who are afraid of crossing that line, or not even knowing where that line is, or being accused of crossing that line when that is not what they want) are going to start backing off until that line is defined...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

18 minutes ago, Dral said:


 

Spoiler

 

So if two reasonable consenting adults are out on a date, and one is invited back to the others home, what are the reasonable expectations of the encounter at home? In today's society and culture, I don't think it's outrageous at all to claim to expect some kind of sexual encounter... By all accounts, when he suggested a sexual act that she said no to - he did not force her to do it... and when he suggested a sexual act that she did NOT say no to, they did it... It desn't necessarily sound like he coerced her to do anything against her will - it sounds more like he asked if she wanted to do this (NO!)... ok, then how about this? (OK!)

 

Someone else mentioned Shapiro, but he put it completely bluntly and is totally true - Men are stupid and men are NOT mind readers,

 

If you asked 100 reasonable men, without this story being a background for context, just straight up "You go on a date with a woman, invite her back to your place, she comes willingly, she's the one who gave you her number in the first place, would you think DTF?"

 

100 reasonable men would answer yes.

 

 

 


At some point in time (and I know I'm going to be accused of victim blaming here),

Spoiler

 

women need to take some responsibility for themselves, say no, get up and leave. Staying, and engaging in other sexual acts is a strong verbal cue that you want some action too...

 

 

If you do not want to have any intimate contact with someone you gave your number too, then went on a date with... DO NOT GO BACK TO THEIR HOME... that is the only strong non-verbal cue you can give that absolutely means no.

 

 

I think women and society in general have not actually defined that line - it's still blurry... and both men and women are guilty of crossing that line (men, by actual sexual assault, and women by claiming sexual assault when no such thing happened)...

 

Until that line is actually clearly defined - we're going to have a problem, and I think most good, honest men (who are afraid of crossing that line, or not even knowing where that line is, or being accused of crossing that line when that is not what they want) are going to start backing off until that line is defined..

 

.

Consider it so done

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

With the different variables in these individual cases, it definitely makes it a convoluted issue.

 

While men are usually the primary initiators of sexual activity with women, I agree that we should bear the most responsibility in these situations. That being said, more common sense should be employed more by both men and women in these matters. (I'm not implying that all men or all women don't use common sense, only some in these matters)

 

I think some men  (not all) need to realize that agreeing to go home with you, or simply not saying no, is not a green light to do whatever you want to her. There are some women that'll be too shy, or too intimidated, to actually say no, or to make a clear non-verbal gesture. We need to take it upon us to stop if she appears at all reluctant to go along with it.

 

As for women, imo some need to make better decisions so they won't likely find themselves in these types of situations. If you're not absolutely sure you want to have sex with him, why go to his house?  Why tempt fate, and put yourself in a possible difficult position? While most guys are decent, there are some who are sharks, and you never tempt a shark, especially in its home waters. You have the right to not be assaulted, absolutely, but rights won't mean a thing if you find yourself alone with a guy who won't respect those rights.

 

Ok, rant over.

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

16 hours ago, riffraff said:

Why don't men and women hire a third party like an arbitrator or ombudsman type to bridge communication between the two parties?

 

the arbitrator can then say things like:  "he said he likes you but isn't sure if it's like like or just like so maybe give it time."

 

or:  "yep! You've got the green light to go ahead and get your freak on"

Isn't that what highschool friends are for?  lol

Guys asking the girl's friends for information and to pass along the inkling that he might be into her.

Girls asking around the guy's friends to check whether he is really serious or whatnot.  

 

 

Best way to solve this current issue...

Men needs to be behave like gentlemen.

Women needs to be ladylike.  

Sounds old fashion and cliche, but respect yourself and respect others.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

6 hours ago, Sweathog said:

With the different variables in these individual cases, it definitely makes it a convoluted issue.

 

While men are usually the primary initiators of sexual activity with women, I agree that we should bear the most responsibility in these situations. That being said, more common sense should be employed more by both men and women in these matters. (I'm not implying that all men or all women don't use common sense, only some in these matters)

 

I think some men  (not all) need to realize that agreeing to go home with you, or simply not saying no, is not a green light to do whatever you want to her. There are some women that'll be too shy, or too intimidated, to actually say no, or to make a clear non-verbal gesture. We need to take it upon us to stop if she appears at all reluctant to go along with it.

 

As for women, imo some need to make better decisions so they won't likely find themselves in these types of situations. If you're not absolutely sure you want to have sex with him, why go to his house?  Why tempt fate, and put yourself in a possible difficult position? While most guys are decent, there are some who are sharks, and you never tempt a shark, especially in its home waters. You have the right to not be assaulted, absolutely, but rights won't mean a thing if you find yourself alone with a guy who won't respect those rights.

 

Ok, rant over.

 

 

I agree that men are usually type-casted as the party that wants sex more. That's part of the problem. The fact that women are shamed for desiring sex and men are praised for it. How can we as a culture/society come to understand and practice consent in a more equitable way when men and women are treated differently for engaging in the same activity?

 

I don't really understand your last point though. The Aziz Ansari situation aside, should all women just say no when a man invites them to their home?  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

13 minutes ago, OneSeventeen said:

I don't really understand your last point though. The Aziz Ansari situation aside, should all women just say no when a man invites them to their home?  

I meant that if she not sure if she wants to have sex, or doesn't want sex at all, then it would be a good idea to not go to his home as it could potentially be a dangerous situation for her if she does go.

 

If she does want to have sex with him, then there's no harm in her going.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Feminists are at the point now where they are folding in on themselves and attacking each other.  It started 2-3 months ago with the biggest idiot out there, Lena Dunham.

 

There are too many looking for advantages and special treatment who are trying to sway public opinion their way.  The sane ones who are just looking for equal pay, equal opportunities, etc. have to deal with and argue with the radical twits who are looking for special advantages akin to "affirmative action".  If you want to be equal, great, I'm there with you, if you want special advantages, not a chance.  Like the sane as well as the radical ones say themselves, being a certain gender should not give you extra rights and privileges.  That argument swings both ways.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...