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12 hours ago, falcon45ca said:

Aussie land is very hot & humid, thus making the peoples sticky. It is this stickiness that keeps them from falling off the planet.

 

How come I get so sleepy right after I wake up?

cuz you are still in the mood

 

Why, why, why......

So I am in a long meeting and I have to pee. Pee bad. I can feel my bladder stretching my belt. Can't leave because something important might happen. But god damn I have to pee.

So why is it the only comforting thing in this situation is for me to drink more &^@#ing water!?

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19 minutes ago, DarthMelvin said:

 

 

What is the meaning of LIFE?

to find happiness and enlightenment. Barring that a lot of money and sex.

 

 

How do I work this? 

 

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26 minutes ago, Shift-4 said:

Do you work for the Department of Redundancy Department?

I used to. And still do.

 

Why did they get rid of stubby beer bottles? 

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52 minutes ago, Cpt.Clutch said:

Apparently, he/she/it/they/ze is my friend, some guy on the internet told me.  

 

What it the pronoun for an attack helicopter?

 

 

Holy $&!# we're all gonna die.

 

 

Why do pineapples always taste like a tomato?

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9 minutes ago, 112 said:

you're eating them the wrong way

 

how do i get ahead in life:the board game?

lie. cheat. step on the little people. and real estate.

 

Can someone explain why cereal is not considered soup? I'm still not clear on it. 

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The base gotta be like multiculturalism.

 

Drummers make everyone around them smarter. However do they inspire laziness by the unhealthy habit of sitting down all the time? Therefore increasing our overall healthcare costs.

 

 

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I would be more concerned about Paralympics and wheelchair sports.  I mean these guys are pretending to be athletes but they’re just sitting down the whole time!  What a sham. 

 

What is the best way to weigh your own head?  

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1 hour ago, Cpt.Clutch said:

I would be more concerned about Paralympics and wheelchair sports.  I mean these guys are pretending to be athletes but they’re just sitting down the whole time!  What a sham. 

 

What is the best way to weigh your own head?  

weigh yourself with your head, cut it off, and then do a new measurement.

 

what is karaoke and should i be concerned if my kid is doing it?

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First signs of karaoke use are really awful hair, compulsive cleaning of sneakers and an overall meek and meager disposition.

Ultimately you need to yell your kid to quit being a &^@#ing poser and just learn to play music, play in bands, drink excessively and experiment with drugs. But stay away from opiates.

 

 

If you could grow anything, what would it be?

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