Popular Post Coconuts Posted December 8, 2020 Popular Post Share Posted December 8, 2020 Just now, Boudrias said: There were 3 of them in a car. Why was she in the back seat with Donatelli? Why didn't she ask her husband to pull over so she could move up with him? Was alcohol involved? The article doesn't provide answers to any of these questions. Could be that the number was actually four and that it was part of someone's job to drive them. Could be all sorts of reasons she was in the back seat, but do any of them really matter if she was actually sexually assaulted? It's not on her to escape sexual assault, it's on the man in question to.. you know.. not sexually assault someone. And alcohol doesn't matter unless someone's trying to paint her as a liar, alcohol doesn't excuse sexual assault. As for pulling over, I already mentioned reasons why a woman might not speak up or fight back. 2 2 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boudrias Posted December 8, 2020 Share Posted December 8, 2020 4 minutes ago, Coconuts said: The article doesn't provide answers to any of these questions. Could be that the number was actually four and that it was part of someone's job to drive them. Could be all sorts of reasons she was in the back seat, but do any of them really matter if she was actually sexually assaulted? It's not on her to escape sexual assault, it's on the man in question to.. you know.. not sexually assault someone. And alcohol doesn't matter unless someone's trying to paint her as a liar, alcohol doesn't excuse sexual assault. As for pulling over, I already mentioned reasons why a woman might not speak up or fight back. Didn't realize it was a car service. You are right it makes no dif at all. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
canuktravella Posted December 8, 2020 Share Posted December 8, 2020 This makes pens management and ownership look even worse than they already are seems lotsa sketchy stuff happens there like rick tocchet running sports betting etcetc shady and if that happened to my wife this guy would be in the hospital real quick. Total classless of Guerin to fire him after wow fells like wild might have to fire bill for breach of conduct but this will be swept under the rug. His poor wife no one should have to be put in a situation like this coach should be jailed. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CanucksCountry Posted December 8, 2020 Share Posted December 8, 2020 1 hour ago, StealthNuck said: Good thing nobody cares if you buy it. Not surprised but disappointed to see victim blaming already here. It's also disappointing to not being able to ask questions if this guy is a sicko and did that with proof, he deserves to be buried under the jail, That being said 4 people in the car and no one else heard it her say no or anything? and come on man it's not that dark in the back seat of a car, and the fact they waited 7 months to report this that's sickening if true they have also but so many other women at risk by not reporting it sooner, I believe in innocent until proven guilty, just because we don't blindly believe her doesn't mean we are victim blaming them already there just needs to more to the story things aren't adding up 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
canuck2xtreme Posted December 8, 2020 Share Posted December 8, 2020 20 minutes ago, CanucksCountry said: It's also disappointing to not being able to ask questions if this guy is a sicko and did that with proof, he deserves to be buried under the jail, That being said 4 people in the car and no one else heard it her say no or anything? and come on man it's not that dark in the back seat of a car, and the fact they waited 7 months to report this that's sickening if true they have also but so many other women at risk by not reporting it sooner, I believe in innocent until proven guilty, just because we don't blindly believe her doesn't mean we are victim blaming them already there just needs to more to the story things aren't adding up I'm not saying I don't believe her. I'm just saying that bit about Jarrod not noticing is really surprising to me. That's literally all I meant. Surprising, but not suspicious. People wait for all kinds of reasons. It's easy to say why would you wait so long, but until you're actually in the situation, you can't really say. If their allegations are true, completely unacceptable, and that's putting it mildly. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CanucksCountry Posted December 8, 2020 Share Posted December 8, 2020 19 minutes ago, canuck2xtreme said: I'm not saying I don't believe her. I'm just saying that bit about Jarrod not noticing is really surprising to me. That's literally all I meant. Surprising, but not suspicious. People wait for all kinds of reasons. It's easy to say why would you wait so long, but until you're actually in the situation, you can't really say. If their allegations are true, completely unacceptable, and that's putting it mildly. I agree with this something just seems off, but this 100% needs to be taken seriously Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JM_ Posted December 8, 2020 Share Posted December 8, 2020 28 minutes ago, CanucksCountry said: I agree with this something just seems off, but this 100% needs to be taken seriously what could be 'off' is no one expects an assault to happen or to witness one. Just look at the years of abuse that can go on with a team coach, e.g. that no one sees happening. Abusers know how to get it done without people noticing. 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sean Monahan Posted December 8, 2020 Share Posted December 8, 2020 (edited) 24 minutes ago, Jimmy McGill said: what could be 'off' is no one expects an assault to happen or to witness one. Just look at the years of abuse that can go on with a team coach, e.g. that no one sees happening. Abusers know how to get it done without people noticing. Yeah. Sandusky molested kids for 15 years and was found guilty on not just one, but 45 counts of it. This isn't a novel thing. Edited December 8, 2020 by Sean Monahan 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post -SN- Posted December 9, 2020 Popular Post Share Posted December 9, 2020 4 hours ago, CanucksCountry said: it's not that dark in the back seat of a car, and the fact they waited 7 months to report this that's sickening if true That's the sickening part of this to you? Jesus. 1 5 1 1 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
canuck73_3 Posted December 9, 2020 Share Posted December 9, 2020 The Penguins are a scumbag organization so not at all surprised about this. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dazzle Posted December 9, 2020 Share Posted December 9, 2020 7 hours ago, CanucksCountry said: I am guessing you also missed the part of the article where it says He also did it in the car? I'm guessing you also missed the part where the article goes into some detail, which I thought was a pleasant surprise to me, why victims take time to make accusations like these. One major factor is shame. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elvis15 Posted December 9, 2020 Share Posted December 9, 2020 (edited) 7 hours ago, Coconuts said: If you don't buy it, that's fine. Trauma, shock, shame, and a myriad of other reactions are common reactions to sexual assault though, there's at least two decades worth of research supporting this. Partner that with fear of losing one's job, potentially creating a hostile work environment where one's boss is in a position of power, bringing a complex scenario to a hockey organization as a coach during the season, and the fact that it's not specified when she decided to speak up and it's really not all that farfetched imo. The article notes that "only later did Mr. Skalde find out what happened to his wife that night" but doesn't specify when later was. Could have been hours, weeks, a month, longer. As for hearing, the article also notes that "Skaldes allege in their claim that Donatelli sexually assaulted Erin when they were briefly alone, first putting his arm around her, calling her “sexy” and pulling her close to him". Immediately after comes the bit where she's trying to fight him off and telling him to stop, one can assume they're still alone at this point based on how things read. Further on, same paragraph, it states that “Mr. Donatelli resumed his sexual assault and battery of Mrs. Skalde once he had her in the darkness of the backseat. He not only groped her breasts again, but also forced his hands down her pants and touched her vagina, despite her efforts to push him away…". The way this reads leads me to believe this is later when the three were in the vehicle together, but it's unclear. Why wouldn't a woman speak up or fight back in the midst of a sexual assault? Even during the midst of sexual assault with someone nearby? Shock, fear, shame, panic. Maybe she shut down. Could be in part because of the relationship between her husband and said man, financial stability. Could be a lot of reasons. Women being sexually assaulted around others ain't as uncommon as many would probably think. If an assault did indeed occur, her reaction and their combined reaction are unique to her and them, as were those of your wife and the the both of you. Reactions to such an experience are unique to the victim/victims and while comparison seems like a natural thing to do, comparing two entirely unique scenarios is tricky. My inclination is to believe the victim in most cases, particularly when the victim is a woman as there's an extensive history of women not being taken seriously when it comes to this sort of thing. Does my believing the victim immediately paint the accused as guilty? No, that's why there are courts and due process. This is an ugly look for the Penguins though, maybe we'll hear more on it down the road. Exactly. I can see how she hoped the first incident would be the end of it, and was so ashamed, she couldn't say anything after it happened. Then, when Donatelli did it again, she was likely even more ashamed she didn't say anything in the first place. Then, even when she did bring it up to her husband later, she was likely still terrified of having others find out and pleaded with her husband to say nothing. The only thing wrong here is Donatelli being a sexual predator, and Guerin and Co. covering it up. Edited December 9, 2020 by elvis15 2 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maginator Posted December 11, 2020 Share Posted December 11, 2020 (edited) I can totally see this dog in heat pulling such a scumbag move. I hate to say it because I love this sport, but the patriarchy is strong in hockey and will be for a while longer. Edited December 11, 2020 by Maginator Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IBatch Posted December 11, 2020 Share Posted December 11, 2020 (edited) On 12/8/2020 at 2:33 PM, #Canucks said: I agree. I don’t condone this behavior it shakes me to the core. However why did she not say anything and let him do it? Why did she not yell for her husband who was right there. You would have to be pretty sneaky not to make noise with someone so close in your vicinity. You weren’t there. Maybe he was talking to the driver - maybe the music was on. This is victim blaming. .... footsies under the table is great fun - but NOT if it’s not reciprocated- and definitely NOT if the other party isn’t single. Very low chance this is fabricated. Shame on all involved.... Edit: given it was a car service, it’s very possible that there was a slider inbetween the front and back seat too. Regardless there is virtually zero reasons two adults (the wife and husband) have for going public with a fabrication like this - it’s their reputations on the line too. And as we’ve found in other stories like this getting air time, this sort of thing often gives other victims courage to speak out. Edited December 13, 2020 by IBatch Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
#Canucks Posted December 11, 2020 Share Posted December 11, 2020 (edited) 1 hour ago, IBatch said: You weren’t there. Maybe he was talking to the driver - maybe the music was on. This is victim blaming. Who hasn’t had a hand job under the table at a bar or in a car with people around... ok well that’s rude but seriously footsies under the table is great fun - but NOT if it’s not reciprocated- and definitely NOT if the other party isn’t single. Very low chance this is fabricated. Shame on all involved.... My intensions were to say there is always two sides and until someone is proven guilty (which I believe he is), we shouldn’t just go ahead and cancel the people or organization involved. Due process will happen as well justice. If you read my other comment in this I do mention that this shakes me to my core, no one should have to go through this. I hope he is tried in Alabama if found guilty with their new Law. Castration before release back into public. Edited December 11, 2020 by #Canucks 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IBatch Posted December 11, 2020 Share Posted December 11, 2020 47 minutes ago, #Canucks said: My intensions were to say there is always two sides and until someone is proven guilty (which I believe he is), we shouldn’t just go ahead and cancel the people or organization involved. Due process will happen as well justice. If you read my other comment in this I do mention that this shakes me to my core, no one should have to go through this. I hope he is tried in Alabama if found guilty with their new Law. Castration before release back into public. Ok - that’s fine too. And yes I agree. Idiots that do stuff like this in power positions regardless of race sex or whatever are going to meet their maker at some point and also get caught. Maybe some in the “ me too” generation end up on a net of lies and false accusations. So that makes sense too. I’m sure due process will uncover the truth - the fact Guerin tried to bury this isn’t a good look for him or PIT at all. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mll Posted December 11, 2020 Share Posted December 11, 2020 The Penguins terminated him 7 days after Skalde informed them. Without a police report was there really something else they could have done? Was Pittsburgh to go public and say they fired Donatelli for assault but have no proof. Wouldn't it put the Skalde into the spotlight and needing to prove that there was assault. They were shocked and it took them 7 months to approach the Penguins -did they really want to go through that ordeal of having to prove their case publicly. Can't Donatelli also fight back and refute the accusation given that there is no police report. The lawsuit claims that the Penguins knew about Donatelli's predatory behaviour. Skalde worked side by side with Donatelli and didn't. He even insisted that his wife sit in the back with Donatelli. Couldn't the Penguins have been just as unaware as Skalde. Why did they fire him this time if they had accepted the behaviour up to then. Couldn't they have also covered up this case if it was not the first time that an assault was reported. Skalde remained with them for another year after reporting the assault. The Penguins say his contract was up this summer - back in September media did report that his contract had not been renewed. He was part of a group of employees fired in May. Skalde claims he was fired because he reported the assault - or was it simply the team not extending him with the AHL in flux. The AHL ceased activities in March and it's been unclear whether there would be an AHL season as they are so dependent on gate revenue. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coconuts Posted October 17, 2021 Share Posted October 17, 2021 The buzz around this story has died a bit, but it hasn't disappeared 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Please sign in to comment
You will be able to leave a comment after signing in
Sign In Now