How do you deal with loneliness?

[Ilunga]

Another great way to help overcoming loneliness is to volunteer in your community.

 

There is a retirement home close to my home.

I visit several of the residents, bring them a bunch of flowers,I am a flower farmer,and hang out with them for a while having a chat and a cup of tea.

Not only are you overcoming your own loneliness you are helping others overcome theirs.

 

 Studies have shown that helping others actually helps you.

[Dedalus]

On 11/17/2021 at 12:41 AM, FaninMex said:

What do you like to do?

Who are you as a person?

I used to have a lot of hobbies when I was younger. I still do have interests outside of work, but I find that I struggle to want to do them now, but that may be due to general anxiety and being in a rut. Those two questions you ask are things I have asked myself ever since I was a child. I was always too self-aware and self-reflective. I generally enjoy exercising, hiking and making music, though.

[Dedalus]

On 11/17/2021 at 12:51 AM, Nuxfanabroad said:

Long distance training. Long rides, runs & swims were the routine, up until about 10 yrs back.

 

Try to get it done early, whenever you've the chance - the whole day feels more productive.

 

It fits so well into a daily lifestyle, here in Japan.

I love this stuff. Unfortunately, I can't train outdoors in Los Angeles. I was training for a half marathon and got a lung infection and the doctor told me to exercise indoors only. Because of the pandemic, I have to admit I haven't been exercising as much as I've wanted to and this has definitely taken a toll on me. I don't want to go to gyms for the time being. (I've been to Japan and loved it, by the way!)

Edited November 19, 2021 by Dedalus

[Bure_of_94]

My Dogs. Also I like to Kayak, walk workout, clean house while cranking tunes. 
 

 

 But in the winter the long periods of darkness, 3-4ft of snow and constant -20 weather, can make me lonely when the kids are at the Ex’s. Try to get out as much as you can. Discover yourself. Treat yourself, get to know you. When you’re alone, it doesn’t mean that you have to be lonely. I found that working out can really change my state of mind. 

[Dedalus]

On 11/17/2021 at 2:09 AM, StanleyCupOneDay said:

That’s about all I can think of, but maybe you or someone else feeling just like you can get some ideas from this post. In the end just realize you’re not alone (I know super cliche and awful response given how you feel, but it really needs to be said and it’s true) in feeling this way, that how you feel is reasonable and to not fight the feeling, but acknowledge and learn to live with it. Feel free for you or anyone else to pm me for emotional/mental support. I may be dealing with my own mental health demons, but I’ll do my best to try to help. No one deserves to be alone while having mental health issues.

Thank you so much for taking the time to write this message. I appreciate it and it has made me feel better. Hope this pandemic ends soon and we're all able to get back to some sense of normality. Hope you're doing well

[Dedalus]

On 11/17/2021 at 7:42 AM, JM_ said:

 

have you checked out expat groups like this? https://www.canadiansabroad.com/

 

 

 

 No! I did not know about that. I will look into it. I think I may feel safer outdoors, though, so hopefully there's that option. Thank you!

[Alflives]

Alf is never alone.

[Dedalus]

On 11/17/2021 at 2:08 PM, VancouverHabitant said:

OP: Do you enjoy watching movies, playing video games or listening to music?  Do you/have you participated in any sports?  Do you like board games?  How old are you (approximate range)? 

 

As far as not feeling comfortable going out in public, if you're vaccinated there's really no use in worrying.  Covid is here to stay, so don't sacrifice your social life.  

 

 

Thank you for the words of encouragement!

 

I actually like making music. I've played hockey and soccer. I also like running, hiking and have done some weight training in the past. I do like playing video games, but I try not to play much. I'm in my late 30s.

[Dedalus]

Hey guys, I have read all your posts and reflected on them. They really mean a lot to me.

 

I just wanted to thank everyone for all the great feedback and support. It has truly made me feel better sharing and knowing I'm not alone in this and that there are people probably worse off.

 

Sending everyone good vibes~

[Nuxfanabroad]

2 hours ago, Dedalus said:

I love this stuff. Unfortunately, I can't train outdoors in Los Angeles. I was training for a half marathon and got a lung infection and the doctor told me to exercise indoors only. Because of the pandemic, I have to admit I haven't been exercising as much as I've wanted to and this has definitely taken a toll on me. I don't want to go to gyms for the time being. (I've been to Japan and loved it, by the way!)

Spent so many yrs as a non-comformist, have forgotten how day-to-day society works. For example, haven't driven a car since the late 90's. Don't carry a cell ph, nor will never, ever buy a F***ing smart(?)phone either. I spend a lot of time in the mtns(when not teaching kids english, with the Missus). Nature can heal the mind/stress.

 

Used to do long triathlons, but time & energy got the squeeze. Had to back off. Really miss it, but still train about 15 hrs/wk, not 25.

 

Never been to California(sorry Page & Plant); but from what I see/hear/read of the place, I couldn't last a day there. So you've got more endurance than I, Gunga Din. I figure a guy needs perhaps 2(at least) of these 3. A lovely squeeze; long training; good reads. Keep the heart, body & mind sound, & the rest is just window-dressing.

Now I may be wrong(or non-pc, whatever?), but this approach has kept me rolling. All the best...

[StanleyCupOneDay]

3 hours ago, Dedalus said:

Thank you so much for taking the time to write this message. I appreciate it and it has made me feel better. Hope this pandemic ends soon and we're all able to get back to some sense of normality. Hope you're doing well

Glad to have helped give you some hope and ideas. I’m doing alright thanks, just taking everything one day at a time so as not to feel overwhelmed. Hope you’re doing ok too. Everyone struggles at times in life and while it’s important to understand many people both here and in the world have worse situations in order to stay grounded at the same time it’s also important to understand that your own problems are valid and worthy of compassion/empathy too. 

[FaninMex]

4 hours ago, Dedalus said:

I used to have a lot of hobbies when I was younger. I still do have interests outside of work, but I find that I struggle to want to do them now, but that may be due to general anxiety and being in a rut. Those two questions you ask are things I have asked myself ever since I was a child. I was always too self-aware and self-reflective. I generally enjoy exercising, hiking and making music, though.

Here is what a quick google search got me.

https://www.timeout.com/los-angeles/things-to-do/best-things-to-do-in-los-angeles

 

There might be a few things that you find interesting. Go to one of those places but here is the catch. You have to talk to 10 people, doesn't matter who they are.

Hello

My name is

Where are you from?

What do you do?

 

And then... who knows. Something might happen. Try to keep the conversation going as long as it feels natural then say bye. 

[Warhippy]

Well, I mean...

 

 

[Tortorella's Rant]

Doing things you enjoy, trying to interact with friends or family, and even possibly trying to make other friends through online groups. Oddly, online gaming because that too is a form of interacting with people therefore talking with them, working with them, having fun.

[6of1_halfdozenofother]

On 11/17/2021 at 12:07 AM, Dedalus said:

spent most of the time together playing music

Here's my suggestion, based on the answer you provided for yourself in one of your posts:

 

Crank up the &^@#ing amp and let 'er rip!  Before you know it, you'll have your own garage band, and everyone'll wanna be your friend!