nux4lyfe Posted February 26, 2012 Share Posted February 26, 2012 The trick is to ask her to participate in something she'll be interested in, for example, Ask her if she likes magic? (who doesn't like magic) when she answers yes, tell her to come over and let's make our clothes dissapear. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phil_314 Posted February 26, 2012 Share Posted February 26, 2012 The trick is to ask her to participate in something she'll be interested in, for example, Ask her if she likes magic? (who doesn't like magic) when she answers yes, tell her to come over and let's make our clothes dissapear. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KoreanHockeyFan Posted February 27, 2012 Share Posted February 27, 2012 After my first semester of university, I think I've learned more useful things on this thread then what I learned in my first 5 classes. (I'm pretty much in the same boat as the OP currently, a little worse though ) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matthew Lombardi 18 Posted March 8, 2012 Author Share Posted March 8, 2012 Thanks everyone for the (mature) responses - they've been really insightful and I'm glad I'm not alone (not to be evil of course) that everyone has similar experiences. Well, looks like I'm screwed. A is me and E is her. [02:51] E: Hmmm I have a weird thing on my mind [02:51] E: all of a sudden I noticed I'm seeing someone [02:51] A: o.O [02:51] A: is that good or bad for you? [02:51] A: [02:52] E: I dt noticed it just.. Gradually I think I'm seeing this person [02:52] A: o.O [02:52] A: is he/she good or bad? [02:52] E: But sucks I can't have this person at my house and u prolly know why [02:52] A: o.O [02:52] E: He's ok lol haha [02:52] E: Sweetest guy so far I've ever met [02:53] E: Sighhhh and there's no place to hang out lol Well I'm the invisible man once again, despite my best efforts to ask her out nice and early. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nucklehead Posted March 8, 2012 Share Posted March 8, 2012 A: I sure hope you're talking about me, I have this thing for you. You knew that right? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jai604 Posted March 8, 2012 Share Posted March 8, 2012 That's life, buddy. But don't get too hung up on her. As I've learned (through countless attempts and failures), there is always someone else around the bend. Sometimes we get so caught up with a particular person that we miss out on other chances that possibly could have been better. Like others have said, when a girl is interested in you, even if she's shy, she will make some sort of effort to get in contact with you. I say this from experience. This is 2012, women will get ahold of you if they're genuinely interested. And like others have posted, don't change who you are to fit someone else's mould. In the end, you won't be able to maintain the facade, and you'll realize the girl you've been dating for 6 months isn't even attracted to the real you. I say this because I played the game for years, thought I was real cool having the power, and never really committing and being all aloof. I thought I was protecting myself by not being honest and straightforward. In the end, all I ever did was deny myself a chance at real happiness. That's not to say you lay your cards down on the table that quick. The reality is that it is a bit of a game, but telling a girl that you're into her that early takes some of the mystique out of it. You want to gauge how much a woman is interested in you, as she is doing the same for you. Like another poster said, coming on too strong can just kill it sometimes, even if the girl is attracted. It all really depends on what's currently going on in her mind. There's no way of knowing what has happened or is happening in her life. So you have to be interested, but not so interested that she doesn't have to return any interest. It's a balancing act. Once you've established that you are together, you'll know when the moment is right to let her know how you feel. But obviously since this girl is just messing with you, in all honesty I would just let her go completely. You've been #friendzoned pretty hard. You're always there to give her the compliments and confidence boosts she craves without ever having to give you anything in return. Girl's not worth it. Like I said, you have to get her out of the way before you can see what's in front of you. Keep your eyes open. Good luck Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JLumme Posted March 8, 2012 Share Posted March 8, 2012 Rule 1: Chicks are crazy. Rule 2: See rule 1. My advice is to ignore her, then she'll be all over you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matthew Lombardi 18 Posted March 8, 2012 Author Share Posted March 8, 2012 That's life, buddy. But don't get too hung up on her. As I've learned (through countless attempts and failures), there is always someone else around the bend. Sometimes we get so caught up with a particular person that we miss out on other chances that possibly could have been better. Like others have said, when a girl is interested in you, even if she's shy, she will make some sort of effort to get in contact with you. I say this from experience. This is 2012, women will get ahold of you if they're genuinely interested. And like others have posted, don't change who you are to fit someone else's mould. In the end, you won't be able to maintain the facade, and you'll realize the girl you've been dating for 6 months isn't even attracted to the real you. I say this because I played the game for years, thought I was real cool having the power, and never really committing and being all aloof. I thought I was protecting myself by not being honest and straightforward. In the end, all I ever did was deny myself a chance at real happiness. That's not to say you lay your cards down on the table that quick. The reality is that it is a bit of a game, but telling a girl that you're into her that early takes some of the mystique out of it. You want to gauge how much a woman is interested in you, as she is doing the same for you. Like another poster said, coming on too strong can just kill it sometimes, even if the girl is attracted. It all really depends on what's currently going on in her mind. There's no way of knowing what has happened or is happening in her life. So you have to be interested, but not so interested that she doesn't have to return any interest. It's a balancing act. Once you've established that you are together, you'll know when the moment is right to let her know how you feel. But obviously since this girl is just messing with you, in all honesty I would just let her go completely. You've been #friendzoned pretty hard. You're always there to give her the compliments and confidence boosts she craves without ever having to give you anything in return. Girl's not worth it. Like I said, you have to get her out of the way before you can see what's in front of you. Keep your eyes open. Good luck Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matthew Lombardi 18 Posted March 8, 2012 Author Share Posted March 8, 2012 Rule 1: Chicks are crazy. Rule 2: See rule 1. My advice is to ignore her, then she'll be all over you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PlayStation Posted March 8, 2012 Share Posted March 8, 2012 Maybe it's an old man pretending to be a girl and too scared to show his real self... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jai604 Posted March 8, 2012 Share Posted March 8, 2012 It seems you're pretty hung up over her. Well, what can I say. In my opinion you should just move on and let this one be a distant memory. Right now, you'll want to be friends, and you'll think you can be "her best friend" and be someone she trusts. The honest truth is you'll just be torturing yourself, because obviously she has no qualms about talking about other men to you. Is that what you really want? I understand the desire to hold on, because a part of you thinks if, just if, you show how great of a guy you are by being her friend, that one day she'll change her mind. I'm sorry to say but that doesn't happen often. And like I said, you will be subjecting yourself to a lot of suffering for what? A very outside chance that she'll turn around? If you're as good a person as you seem to be, you shouldn't wait around for this woman, and let her play her mind games on you. It's always hardest to do the right thing, but in this case the right thing is to let go, and move on. Believe me, in the end it will be for the better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NikiShiz Posted March 8, 2012 Share Posted March 8, 2012 From a girls perspective, it looks like she doesn't want a boyfriend but wants to keep her options open and loves the attention you're giving her. Ignore her and she will come around. I don't know why and I don't personally agree with this but in general, girls are more attracted to jerks. The nicer the guy, the quicker he is likely to get walked all over. Good luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustJokinen! Posted March 8, 2012 Share Posted March 8, 2012 Your first mistake was being too into a girl you've never even met. You can't let yourself get too worked up about it. In the future don't rule out anything like you did by saying you don't want a FWB. By doing that you're just limiting your options, and maybe it will turn into something more later on anyway. It sounds like she was probably not looking for something serious and you kind of turned her off. Don't try to be the perfect gentleman all the time, I've made that mistake too. Best you can do now is just be cool. Next time she texts you do what Stefan said. Good luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matthew Lombardi 18 Posted March 8, 2012 Author Share Posted March 8, 2012 It seems you're pretty hung up over her. Well, what can I say. In my opinion you should just move on and let this one be a distant memory. Right now, you'll want to be friends, and you'll think you can be "her best friend" and be someone she trusts. The honest truth is you'll just be torturing yourself, because obviously she has no qualms about talking about other men to you. Is that what you really want? I understand the desire to hold on, because a part of you thinks if, just if, you show how great of a guy you are by being her friend, that one day she'll change her mind. I'm sorry to say but that doesn't happen often. And like I said, you will be subjecting yourself to a lot of suffering for what? A very outside chance that she'll turn around? If you're as good a person as you seem to be, you shouldn't wait around for this woman, and let her play her mind games on you. It's always hardest to do the right thing, but in this case the right thing is to let go, and move on. Believe me, in the end it will be for the better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GodzillaDeuce Posted March 8, 2012 Share Posted March 8, 2012 I'm flattered that you mentioned I am/was a good person but in fact, I'm not. Having lingering bitter thoughts about this isn't what a good person does. I should be happy (as a friend) that she potentially has found someone she really likes, yet I have to feign happiness to her. A lot of other people face this stuff every day, sometimes relationship after relationship and despite holding their heart on their sleeves, they get up and try again. Ugh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raph Posted March 8, 2012 Share Posted March 8, 2012 Honestly, if a girl wants to spend time with you and talk to you, she will. She won't make excuses. Even if I am busy on a night that a guy asks me out, I will say no but suggest another date. While I say no to coffee on Wednesday, I offer to meet for coffee on Thursday. Her sidestepping questions and suggestions to meet is clearly because she's not interested. And, I hate to point out a television show, but How I Met Your Mother actually made an interesting point in that "we are always on someone's hook, and we always have someone on our hook." This girl, while having no real romantic feelings for you, is keeping you on her hook. It may be because she sees you as a backup or maybe she just feels attractive knowing a guy is interested in her without reciprocating any feelings. Whatever the reason, I personally say forget about it and move on. Relationships should never be this frustrating and complicated. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stefan Posted March 9, 2012 Share Posted March 9, 2012 +1 to this. I hate girls who make excuses. Oh, I'm invited to 30 birthday parties. I got work. I got homework. My family is expecting me. All BS. If someone is important to you, you MAKE TIME. You always have enough time. You don't have to show up at some b-day of some guy you barely know just to have a drink with him. You can ignore the calls of the guy who you don't really like. Just because someone invites you to some event, doesn't mean you have to go. You control your own life. I met my current GF at a time when she was busiest. She was going into exams. After exams, she would be going on a work placement in the interior, so she had to find housing and take care of admin stuff before leaving for a month. Most of our iniital meetings were last minute, at odd hours, or not exactly what you would call "a date", but we still met up. A girl who can't make time is either: a) can't prioritize their time, can't so no to others, drama queen and not worth your time b )not interested in you c) actually busy (unlikely, unless if she is a single mom, working f/t, and going to school) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Matthew Lombardi 18 Posted March 11, 2012 Author Share Posted March 11, 2012 Thanks for all the responses everyone - I will just walk away from this girl. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dellins Posted March 11, 2012 Share Posted March 11, 2012 Only look back if she's facing the other way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss Korea Bob.Loblaw Posted March 12, 2012 Share Posted March 12, 2012 Only look back if she's facing the other way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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