confessions

[brilac]

I get super highly uncomfortable when someone tries to pay for me, especially on dates. I either have to take a super deep breath, drink a lot of wine, or know the person for them to pay for me. When someone tries to pay for me, and I have not had a lot of wine, taken a super deep breath, or know the person, I always think - what do they want? And try to come up with a way to pay for myself, such as getting my card/cash out right away. I understand the concept of dating - getting to know the person and letting someone pay for me.

[aGENT]

I always think - what do they want?

[FramingDragon]

I get super highly uncomfortable when someone tries to pay for me, especially on dates. I either have to take a super deep breath, drink a lot of wine, or know the person for them to pay for me. When someone tries to pay for me, and I have not had a lot of wine, taken a super deep breath, or know the person, I always think - what do they want?.

Are you serious?

[Monty]

Confession:

I started getting the male version of a "Brazilian Wax" (Manzilian?) about 6 months ago.

Please don't judge me.

Edited November 3, 2014 by Monty

[FramingDragon]

Confession:

I started getting the male version of a "Brazilian Wax" (Manzilian?) about 6 months ago.

Please don't judge me.

Did your wife sit you down and tell you she expects it in return for her getting fit?

I haven't even gotten a Brazilian wax yet, looks so painful. Epilators are also hellish but your privacy isn't invaded as much

[Monty]

Did your wife sit you down and tell you she expects it in return for her getting fit?

I haven't even gotten a Brazilian wax yet, looks so painful. Epilators are also hellish but your privacy isn't invaded as much

My motives for doing it were pretty sad/pervy. However, what can I say, I'm a guy.

For starters, I always kept trim to begin with. However, I was tired of constantly shaving every 2 days. Finally, I thought "Why not be a total douche and get everything ripped?" Since I'm in better shape now, as well, I knew that it would look better than had I done it a year ago.

Secondly, my wife has not had a Brazilian wax either. Now, because I'm a guy and pretty petty down to my core, I selfishly (and for her benefit as well) want her to have one. However, knowing her personality, she would have told me it was too painful and she would not do it. Now, since I've been doing it, she always asks how it went and how much it hurts. I tell her the truth, that it is not the most pleasant experience. But I said that I just pop two advils ahead of time and all is good.

She'll be getting her first one next month. Monty gets his wish!

[brilac]

Are you serious?

I am absolutely serious. I am more of a thinker and a listener. I enjoy listening to people, what they have to say, how they are, react, facial expressions, etc. When I think - what do they want. It's not necessary bad. I am just cautious. On the other hand, years ago, I had someone mooch off me, I didn't realize for years, but realized it after it was all done and over with, towards the end of it, and I told myself that I would never put someone in a position to buy me things, pay for me, not even on dates. I don't expect anyone to do anything for me, and never will.

[LaBamba]

Just remembered another good one.

My mom walked in the bathroom to find me manscaping with one leg up on the bathroom counter while straddling the open toilet so everything convienantly fell in it.

I almost think it was worse for her. I actually thought it was funny.

[Mr. Ambien]

My motives for doing it were pretty sad/pervy. However, what can I say, I'm a guy.

For starters, I always kept trim to begin with. However, I was tired of constantly shaving every 2 days. Finally, I thought "Why not be a total douche and get everything ripped?" Since I'm in better shape now, as well, I knew that it would look better than had I done it a year ago.

Secondly, my wife has not had a Brazilian wax either. Now, because I'm a guy and pretty petty down to my core, I selfishly (and for her benefit as well) want her to have one. However, knowing her personality, she would have told me it was too painful and she would not do it. Now, since I've been doing it, she always asks how it went and how much it hurts. I tell her the truth, that it is not the most pleasant experience. But I said that I just pop two advils ahead of time and all is good.

She'll be getting her first one next month. Monty gets his wish!

You say you "selfishly" want her to have a brazilian too, but despite your own obvious reasons, it helps you help her as well. No guy likes a mouthful of hair (or hair getting in his nose), especially if he's gonna be down there 30 mins to 2 hours in a night.

Edited November 4, 2014 by Mr. Ambien

[Monty]

You say you "selfishly" want her to have a brazilian too, but despite your own obvious reasons, it helps you help her as well. No guy likes a mouthful of hair (or hair getting in his nose), especially if he's gonna be down there 30 mins to 2 hours in a night.

2 hours? No thank you.

[Mr. Ambien]

2 hours? No thank you.

Weak.

[riffraff]

Weak.

You must have the jaw of a pitbull and the toungue of a lizard

[FramingDragon]

It's an appetizer, not the main meal

[Mr. Ambien]

You must have the jaw of a pitbull and the toungue of a lizard

Well no, I just don't strain myself trying to get it over with. It probably also helps if she isn't fat.

[Monty]

It's an appetizer, not the main meal

Exactly.

There's nothing wrong with taking time. But 2 hours is, first a flat out lie; and second, completely unnecessary.

[Mr. Ambien]

Exactly.

There's nothing wrong with taking time. But 2 hours is, first a flat out lie; and second, completely unnecessary.

Number one, no one actually would be down there 2 hours every time. Secondly, completely unnecessary? Do you guys think real life is a porn video where the first 5 minutes are warming up the oven and then the girl is dicked until she gets a facial? Did you think by 30 minutes to 2 hours, that was all in one go? Yikes. Sounds like a terrible sex life to me to think that's outrageous -- or even worse, a lie. "You got yours, and I got mine"

Edited November 4, 2014 by Mr. Ambien

[Monty]

Number one, no one actually would be down there 2 hours every time. Secondly, completely unnecessary? Do you guys think real life is a porn video where the first 5 minutes are warming up the oven and then the girl is dicked until she gets a facial? Did you think by 30 minutes to 2 hours, that was all in one go? Yikes. Sounds like a terrible sex life to me to think that's outrageous -- or even worse, a lie. "You got yours, and I got mine"

First: To each there own.

Second: Yes, two hours is completely unnecessary.

Third: I don't know what pron emulates, I'm married and could care less.

Fourth: 30 minutes is easily enough time. It's about quality, not quantity.

Fifth: After 11 years of marriage, and I've said this in another thread, my wife's and my sex life is 1000x better then it was 11 years ago.

[Mr. Ambien]

First: To each there own.

Second: Yes, two hours is completely unnecessary.

Third: I don't know what pron emulates, I'm married and could care less.

Fourth: 30 minutes is easily enough time. It's about quality, not quantity.

Fifth: After 11 years of marriage, and I've said this in another thread, my wife's and my sex life is 1000x better then it was 11 years ago.

A married guy who doesn't look at porn? Who's lying now? Although, your caring continuum double standard says otherwise.

If you had said "to each their own" to begin with the whole hilarity of "two hours? must be a lie" would have been avoided. 30 minutes = enough time is for people who are looking to get it over with. The fact that guys don't go the extra mile for their partner is likely why there's so many crappy relationships or women having fake orgasms.

Just to note, if you're actually enjoying yourself, or should I say, "yourselves", the time flies.

[Monty]

A married guy who doesn't look at porn? Who's lying now? Although, your caring continuum double standard says otherwise.

If you had said "to each their own" to begin with the whole hilarity of "two hours? must be a lie" would have been avoided. 30 minutes = enough time is for people who are looking to get it over with. The fact that guys don't go the extra mile for their partner is likely why there's so many crappy relationships or women having fake orgasms.

Just to note, if you're actually enjoying yourself, or should I say, "yourselves", the time flies.

30 minutes = enough time for oral, yes. Again, 2 hours is completely unnecessary. Even married people without kids (me and my wife) don't have time for a 3 hour session when all is said and done. 1 hour session, absolutely; which, I might add, is infinitely more then what most married couples either a. Can afford to spend; or b. Are willing to spend.

My wife and I get to bed at 10pm most nights. For example, I'll use yesterday as an example:

1. Pick my wife up at work at 7pm

2. Bring dinner that I already made with me so she could eat on the way home

3. Once home at 7:15pm, quickly let the dogs out and put them back in their kennels for the evening so my wife and I can spend the next 3 hours "making the beast with two backs".

4. Forget about talking to my wife and catching up on her day, who cares?

5. Forget about chores, dishes, laundry. I'll wait until tomorrow.

6. Doing the budget? Who cares?

1 hour is not only more then enough, it is more then what majority of married couples allot their time to.

[Mr. Ambien]

30 minutes = enough time for oral, yes. Again, 2 hours is completely unnecessary. Even married people without kids (me and my wife) don't have time for a 3 hour session when all is said and done. 1 hour session, absolutely; which, I might add, is infinitely more then what most married couples either a. Can afford to spend; or b. Are willing to spend.

My wife and I get to bed at 10pm most nights. For example, I'll use yesterday as an example:

1. Pick my wife up at work at 7pm

2. Bring dinner that I already made with me so she could eat on the way home

3. Once home at 7:15pm, quickly let the dogs out and put them back in their kennels for the evening so my wife and I can spend the next 3 hours "making the beast with two backs".

4. Forget about talking to my wife and catching up on her day, who cares?

5. Forget about chores, dishes, laundry. I'll wait until tomorrow.

6. Doing the budget? Who cares?

1 hour is not only more then enough, it is more then what majority of married couples allot their time to.

Ever since we had our first kid, we haven't been doing it "every day" in the fashion you describe.

And we also don't wait for permission, a married couple with kids have to make time.

Clearly you also overlooked the "30 minutes to.." part, in focusing so religiously on "2 hours", and even going to "3 hours", pretty much on par with your "every day" or "in one go" presumptive talk -- I'm under the impression that the fact I actually put out more of an effort for my wife sparked or tripped some type of jealous/inferiority complex, and to make up for it, you had to claim I'm making it up, all while lying about not looking at porn. Are you Mormon or something? Usually when I openly talk about my sex life to those people, I get the same reaction. There's nothing wrong with it if you are, but it would explain a few things.