AppleJack

I don't think this should shock anyone at all giving how much I love the walking dead.... and who could resist this man...especially when he is holding a cat... AND OF course my favorite hockey player... cough...cough.

I really have lost all interest in Raw its a shame because some of my favorite wrestlers are on Raw but the show is just so boring. Even the Raw payper view was boring. I am to the point that I don't give a crap if Charlotte or Sasha has the title. Its just so repetitive and boring. The only thing I am liking at all is Jerico but that's because Jerico is Jerico and I adore him. Smackdown on the other hand I am really loving and actually look forward to. I am a bit bias though cause Dean Ambrose is actually my all time favorite wrestler but I do hope they keep the title on Styles a bit longer because I feel styles is the hardest worker on both shows.

I took our kitties out in the snow today, I don't think they enjoyed it much. Gilly just meowed a lot and Discord kept trying to dig into the snow and hide. It was so cute. I don't remember the last time it was this cold out though, and although I think its pretty and festive and I really enjoy it I hope it doesn't snow around new years since Ts and I are suppose to go to Chilliwak to spend New Years with my family and we haven't seen them since thanksgiving.

Just thought I'd pop in a post a photo so you guys would know I am still around. I don't post much anymore but I do sometimes come onto the forums and poke around. So today I took our kitty Discord out in the snow. He has never experienced snow before so I took a lot of videos and pictures so of course I had to take a kitty selfie with him.

When we watch raw we fastforward through 90 percent of it but when we watch smack down we watch all of it. Smackdown is so much better in every way even the more boring storylines are way more likeable then anything Raw puts on. It's to the point I am starting not even care about my favorite (except bayley) raw wrestlers it's just all so boring.

So apparently I can't tell the difference between Chicken and Turkey breast.... and I am allergic to Chicken

Every time Reigns opens his mouth I want to vomit . I seriously don't know why they think anyone could actually like him over Styles. Give me a break...

Thank you so very kindly for your kindness. it's people like you and JR and various others who have supported us that makes CDC a good place. I just ignore the others. I was journaling for a bit but stopped mid march. I think i'll take it up again at least on the weekends. I am far to tired to do anything after work. It was super helpful when I was doing it and I don't know exactly why I stopped doing it to be honest. I don't think my families trying to be cruel but their behavior is beyond disgusting. I am already on rocky grounds with that part of my family anyways so I am not surprised by it. They are CRAZY super religious and I think they accepted things cause God gave them another grandchild. My dad's told me pretty much that already. We are very spiritual and do believe in a higher power so I don't know if they think it brings comfort. It doesn't. It's probably the 2nd worse thing you can say to someone in this situation. The first being "it happened for a reason". I always ask just what was that reason because we don't even have a true cause of death just some educated guesses. So I don't see a reason for telling someone this at all. I am happy for your friend rainbow babies must be the most magical thing in the world. I also love that term rainbow babies. It's so hopeful. I have heard it used a lot and have also heard the term 'hope baby' used for during pregnancy. Ts and I attend this support group called empty cradle. It provides comfort because everyone understands what we are going through there. There are some women who have had rainbow babies so that's also helpful. I am glad for the group and feel it's helped me alot. I eventually plan on getting a tattoo with our babies footprints and angel wings. I am not when I will get it though. I just started working again (with children) and that's forced me to get out of bed even when I don't want to. I feel bad cause I never told the family about the baby or that we plan to try for another soon but I don't really feel like indulging that information just yet and if anything it makes me better at my job because every moment with a child is more precious. It also makes my job harder because I am reminded to often just what I lost. My counselor thought it was a good idea and I am able to only work part time so it's probably the best fit. If I had worked at wallmart or something I would have had to work full time. it's been a long journey but I think we are working through things together and growing stronger. thanks again for being there.

Thanks for the support. My sisters super understanding and my mom's being great but the rest of the family are putting a lot of pressure on me on regards to 'Being there' for my sister and going to see the baby. I want to wait a bit till its not so raw or we are pregnant again before doing that but they keep 'guiding' me in what they feel is best. it's something I have been dealing with since we lost our baby because my sister was already pregnant at the time and thus made it all okay for most of my family. I do feel my son's been pushed aside because he's dead. I also pretty much be blamed by various family members because we told ppl right away about the pregnancy and because we and others bought us stuff. It makes me so angry that I'd been basically told I am the reason my baby died because we weren't superstitious. My step mother has also heavly hinted that we should wait a full year at least to get pregnant again because it would be bad luck to be pregnant when our baby's birthday rolls around.

My sister just had a baby and I am super happy for her I am also really jealous that she has one and I don't. I been told these feelings are normal giving what happened with our baby. I thought I was dealing with it but this morning I read numerous fb status updates from my family going on and on about how 'brave and strong' my sister is because she had a C section. This made me furious to the point I wanted to throw my phone out the window. Brave and strong for having a C section are you freaking kidding me! Try giving birth to a dead baby and then having to live with that. Try returning to work with children because it's the only thing your good at and your counselor says it will be a 'healing' experience. Try knowing that even though you plan to try for another baby there is no guarantees that you won't lose that baby, oh and also you may actually be putting your life at risk because you are prone to blood clots. That's strong and brave not cause you had a C section! I of course can't post this anywhere and I can't blame my sister for my families stupidity. it's just really frustrating I get that babies are exciting news but enough is enough. My dad even had the audacity to tell me everything's fine now cause my sister had a baby so I can stop grieving.

I am a casual fan but not even I buy into those smack down cheers.

I watched wrestling with my dad as a kid but I wasn't super into it. I recognized wrestlers back then but I didn't have favorites or anything. I have a feeling I am going to really get into it this time. I even PVR the Walking Dead on Sunday (which is my show) so I could watch Wrestlemania. The hell in a cell match was entertaining and all but it was kind of disappointing since I wanted the undertaker to lose.

I hate Roman Reigns he's so annoying I know they want us to think he's this great savior but he's really just a greasy Heel. I totally understand why TS keeps saying Reigns is shoved down our throats. I really hope Styles beats him that title match even though I know he won't I just started watching wrestling about 2 months ago and I am starting to have favorites. I really like Dean Ambrose because he's just nuts and very charismatic. I like how he doesn't give up. I LOVE the 'bromance' between AJ styles and Y2J. I love how Jerico goes all crazy when the fans start cheering for Styles. It's very amusing. I actually think they are secretly in love with each other <3. I LOVE the NEW day! I want to legit buy Booty-oh's. They are so entertaining. I also hate the Uso's they are so overexposed and lack charisma. I don't mind Sasha though I love Becky got some style and I like her spunk. Charlotte and her lame father can just go away. Ts was telling me about this Bayley chick she sounds interesting. He was saying she has a back story with Sasha, Becky and the she-demon (charlotte). Sorry about the long post TS told me about this thread and I thought it would be cool to come in here and learn more about wrestling. Ts also says you all are super cool

I am not sure if anyone else has had to deal with EI but the whole process is very very VERY frustrating. I am trying to get my claimed switched from Mat leave to Regular EI. The process to switch my claim will take 3 weeks and I can't access work BC services until I am on Regular EI. I can't work in the field I am trained to work (childcare) so I need to be re-trained which means I can't look for work until I am able to access work BC. The EI case worker I saw today said my doctors note (regarding re-training) may not be enough as it doesn't have a return to work date on it. So now I am going have to go to the doctors office and get another note but I can't do that till my claim is switched but they may not switch my claim without it. The case worker pretty much told me just to wait till my Mat leave is up which isn't till April 27th.. I do not want to wait because I am medically cleared to try for another baby now. If we get pregnant right away I will need 600 hours to get mat leave again and the job I am thinking of switching to may include going back to school for 6 months. So the sooner we get me to see Work BC the better but EI is making it way to hard. Its very overwhelming and I just want to sit on the floor and cry and say screw it all and just cave and wait till my Mat leave is up.

I started watching WWE with my guy... and I must confess I am enjoying it....but only because I ship the wrestlers. AJ X Jericho Ambrose and Reigns. OTP's forever!!!

Some jerky old guy almost knocked me over trying to get to the biomedical lab a whole two seconds before me. He then proceeded to stand next to the 'ticket' machine and smirk as I hobbled by him (broke the tip of my big toe) I confess I got a bit of a thrill by the glare he gave me when I went straight past him not collecting a ticket because I had an appointment. He was still waiting his turn when I was leaving and I sent him a big smile. He looked so unhappy it made my day. It's called Karma old man Karma.

I am so sorry to hear about your father passing away. If I can do anything let me know. hugs.

We got the autopsy report back on our baby they couldn't find a cause of death. He was perfectly healthy. The doctor thinks his heart skip a beat and just didn't start again but he can't say for sure that's what happened. He basically said it was like the pregnancy version of SIDS. There just isn't an answer and our baby should be alive. My original due date is coming up in a few weeks. It's very frustrating. I should have a baby instead I get ashes and a teddy bear in his memory. I thought if I had an answer, a reason for his death I'd be okay. We would at least know what happened to our son but there's nothing.

Thank you! They are so sweet as well.

Oh wow. Thank you so much. I admit it hasn't been easy. I have been an emotional and physical mess since October but everyday I feel more like myself and l am growing stronger. I have had a lot of support both professionally and family and friend wise. I also really appreciate the support everyone on here has given both Ts and I. I also thought I'd share something else with you guys. These two furbrats here have given me so much strength. Just being responsible for them has kept me grounded. Gilly has been a silent but constant friend, giving me 'head bumps' when I need them and kitty kisses. Discord is our crazy, spazzy, chaotic 10 month old kitten (he's the black cat). He is very special and very sweet. He follows me around everywhere I go and is always there when I need a reminder that life does go on. We also believe he had a special bond with our baby and that our child lives on through that bond, so we feel very close to him. I know we have a post yo pet thread and both these furbrats have been posted in it before but I thought it was appropriate to share how much these two have helped me.

Thanks everyone I admit Its been a long hard road to recovery but I am feeling a lot better. edit: I was feeling better till I went to the doctors.... My doctor basically just cleared me medically for us to try again for another baby except I have to wait till I have a specific test done to try and figure out why I am having breast pain for so long... and the earliest appointment isn't till April 28th. I am on the cancellation list so hopefully I can get an earlier appointment but it just feels like a kick in the gut. To be told that you are healthy enough (providing there isn't anything seriously wrong with my heart or any new blood clots) but then the medical test they want you to do can't be done on someone who is pregnant. So even though Medically we are cleared we have to wait another 3 months so I can get this test done. It just seems so unfair.