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Arranged/Love Marriage


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#1 DhillonCanuck

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Posted 26 February 2013 - 11:39 PM

What do you guys support and why? Discuss.
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#2 SkeeterHansen

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Posted 26 February 2013 - 11:43 PM

What do you mean?
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#3 Where's Wellwood

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Posted 26 February 2013 - 11:44 PM

I don't support arranged marriages. I think you should love who you marry. If you love who you're arranged to marry, then go for it I guess.

Edited by Where's Wellwood, 26 February 2013 - 11:45 PM.

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#4 King Heffy

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Posted 26 February 2013 - 11:50 PM

Dangerously close to prostitution.
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#5 believe in blue forever

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Posted 26 February 2013 - 11:57 PM

Both are fine
As long as you like the person and aren't being forced it doesn't matter if its an arranged or love marriage in my opinion
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#6 :D

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Posted 27 February 2013 - 12:00 AM

I'd support it, assuming my arrangement involved an attractive wife
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#7 Canucks_fo_life

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Posted 27 February 2013 - 12:03 AM

I'm brown and have always been against arranged marriages, why? It's embarrassing, means you can't even find anyone on your own, or, the harsh fact, you just simply don't have game. and that goes for the women too. I'm in my final relationship of my life, we've been together 5 years and met on our own.
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#8 rampage

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Posted 27 February 2013 - 12:38 AM

Brown too, arranged marriages are fcken stupid why let your parents or anyone else choose who YOU marry?? It's absolutely retarded and I can't believe it still happens.

Edited by rampage, 27 February 2013 - 12:41 AM.

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#9 Dellins

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Posted 27 February 2013 - 12:41 AM

Love of course. We'll have to wait and see how long it'll be until the cultures that still have arranged marriages catch up. Still gonna take a while imo.
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#10 Lancaster

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Posted 27 February 2013 - 12:42 AM

I guess the OP has an assignment on the topic.
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#11 UFTcan

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Posted 27 February 2013 - 12:45 AM

If your for it, I suggest not moving to countries opposed to it.

That is India's problem, not ours.
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#12 Bitter Melon

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Posted 27 February 2013 - 12:48 AM

I'm against marriage. That said, I can see why people do both.

Edited by CAPSLOCK, 27 February 2013 - 12:54 AM.

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#13 SNACanuck

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Posted 27 February 2013 - 01:01 AM

Arrange marriages exist all over the world. Whatever floats someone else's boat is fine by me. But personally I wouldn't do it... unless of course her family was loaded :rolleyes:
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#14 Lychees

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Posted 27 February 2013 - 02:27 AM

The concept of "love" is so fickle in today's society
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#15 Riviera82

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Posted 27 February 2013 - 03:07 AM

I dont really care because I dont have to worry about it.
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#16 Mr. Ambien

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Posted 27 February 2013 - 05:43 AM

I don't see a problem.. government does on the other hand.
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#17 nucklehead

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Posted 27 February 2013 - 07:55 AM

Dangerously close to prostitution.


Our system or theirs?
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#18 Ovech Trick

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Posted 27 February 2013 - 08:03 AM

Just to clear this up, there is a difference between arranged and forced.
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#19 Mr. White

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Posted 27 February 2013 - 08:44 AM

Just to clear this up, there is a difference between arranged and forced.


This. And I think it's stupid. Unless it just happens that they do love each other than they shouldn't have to get married
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#20 Mainly Mattias

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Posted 27 February 2013 - 12:57 PM

Love can grow from the familiarity and routine resulting from an arranged marriage so they're not mutually exclusive things.

Arranged marriages are a family affair, so you have support/approval of the parents - at least it's one less obstacle.
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#21 iwtl

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Posted 27 February 2013 - 01:39 PM

Society has high enough divorce rates when people freely pick their own spouses - In some sense I guess that suggests that arranged marriages couldn't be any worse but still - If folks won't be happy with someone they freely picked what would suggest they would be any happier with someone picked for them?
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#22 Monty

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Posted 27 February 2013 - 02:38 PM

The concept of "love" is so fickle in today's society


This 100%. People are so quick to divorce when the going gets tough, that marriage has become an absolute joke, which it isn't.My wife has told me that the first 2 years of our marriage was an absolute nightmare for her, which I knew at the time as well. My mother left my dad 4 months before our wedding, which had a profound effect on me in the coming years. Seeing as though it was my mom who left him (she cheated), things were tough for me because a.) I was/am incredibly close to my mom, and b.) Was questioning how I could really trust my wife. After a few years and a move to Manitoba, our marriage only grew stronger year after year. After 9 years of marriage, my wife and I always say that this year was even better than the last; and that working through the tough times has only strengthened our relationship.Unfortunately, people are far too quick to throw in the towel.
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#23 iwtl

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Posted 27 February 2013 - 03:34 PM

after nearly 25 years of happy marriage 2 things my wife and I promised each other have really helped to keep things in percpective.

First - A promise to never cheat - If either of us should ever want to be with someone else pick up the phone - call the other person and tell them it's over then go have your fun .... Should my marriage ever failed my personel experiance shows that friends who have divorced and either party cheated have never been able to function as a family unit - ever. Friends whos marriages ended prior to either of them entering new relationships have had a better change at atleast being friendly. If you have kids you owe it to your kids to ensure that should you marriage be over that you end it in such a manner that it does not prevent the parents being able to be civil and loving when together for family functions. Kids for the most part can understand when parents fall out of love - in fact they probably saw it before you 2 do - kids also understand cheating is wrong.

Second - Any time you fight either one of you should keep in mind - "is this issue worth divorcing over ?". In other words pick your hill to die on. Many times over the years during an arguement either my wife or I have raised that point during the arguement - When fighting over who did what ( normally something pretty stupid - not cheating or anything one would end a marriage over ) - when you think about it ... is that particular issue worth dying on your hill when you take your stand? Every single time that point is raised it deflates the arguement pretty quickly. The art of being able to see others opinions and to being willing to bend without breaking seem to be lost arts in relations. In this time of instant gratification things become far to disposable and that includes relationships and marraiges.

Being ex military before we could get married it was compulsary to take pre marriage counceling as a couple. Sounds silly but it is still in most units a unit policy ( if not from QR&O's ) to request permission to get married. It also in many units considered proper protocal to invite either the RSM or CO depending on rank. Don't think anyone is ever denied but it provides a chance for counciling first. The counciling focused on effective communication in conflict and boundry setting. The boundry setting was specific discussion for couples on what the issues where that you felt where or could be "divorce issues" and how to aviod them or deal with them. Everyone picks the same 2 as tops ( cheating and abuse ) but the other on the top 5 lists may raise an eyebrow or 2.

We require people to pass driving tests - fire arm tests. Marraige and or raising Kids is equally as important and worthy in my opinion in some pre marraige education before issueing that marriage license. In the older generation that was provided by manditory church counciling, but as we seperate Church and State it has fallen by the side over the last 40 years.

Edited by iwtl, 27 February 2013 - 03:37 PM.

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#24 Squeak

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Posted 27 February 2013 - 04:06 PM

I'm against marriage. That said, I can see why people do both.


Sounds like someone got their heartbroken....
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#25 Bitter Melon

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Posted 27 February 2013 - 04:45 PM

Sounds like someone got their heartbroken....

Actually no. I just don't understand the point of a binding legal contract saying two people have to love each other forever. Marriage arose out of superstition and as a political tool. There really isn't much point to it in modern society.
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#26 мцт вяздк чф

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Posted 27 February 2013 - 04:48 PM

so do brown people also arrange gay marriages?
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#27 Squeak

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Posted 27 February 2013 - 04:57 PM

Actually no. I just don't understand the point of a binding legal contract saying two people have to love each other forever. Marriage arose out of superstition and as a political tool. There really isn't much point to it in modern society.


You do realize that if you live with someone for 6 months... then they are common-law...... which basically allows them to the same rights as a marriage....


So.............your view is one that is going to live alone for the remainder of your life.

Edited by Squeak, 27 February 2013 - 04:58 PM.

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#28 D-Money

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Posted 27 February 2013 - 04:59 PM

The amount of respect that spouses have for each other, and for the marital arrangement in general, has a far greater impact on the marriage than who arranged things.
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#29 Bitter Melon

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Posted 27 February 2013 - 05:05 PM

You do realize that if you live with someone for 6 months... then they are common-law...... which basically allows them to the same rights as a marriage....


So.............your view is one that is going to live alone for the remainder of your life.

I know what common law marriage, and obviously I'm against that if I don't like the idea of getting married. As for your snide remarks on living alone, I have no idea what the future holds. Also, you do realize not everyone ever has to spend the rest of their lives in BC, right?

Edited by CAPSLOCK, 27 February 2013 - 05:08 PM.

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#30 Squeak

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Posted 27 February 2013 - 05:11 PM

I know what common law marriage, and obviously I'm against that if I don't like the idea of getting married. As for your snide remarks on living alone, I have no idea what the future holds. Also, you do realize not everyone ever has to spend the rest of their lives in BC, right?


So you are against the possibility of losing 50% of you assets to someone who you may separate from then.

Common-law status is common throughout first-world countries.... so although BC has more stringent guidelines to these laws, it is still only avoidable by not living with anyone...ever....

Edited by Squeak, 27 February 2013 - 05:12 PM.

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