Mental health support

[on the cycle]

This thread is a place for people to talk about their or others mental health such as depression, anxiety, stress, etc. 

I have been quietly struggling with depression for about 5 years and this is the first time I have told anyone but my brother. 

Many mental health support sites such as Mind check can be hard to find someone to talk to and they aren't very personal. It is still another resource which is good but I don't think it can help everyone.

I always used to be (and still am) embarrassed to talk about my depression. I hope we can try to reduce the stigma around it. Depression can strike at anytime and isn't necessarily caused by one or two issues, it can be caused by many combined issues or none at all. Remember sometimes just talking to someone can help far more than you can think.

Please no abusive or judgmental comments. 

[The Weasel]

Good to hear that you're willing to post about it! It is a really good step. I actually have social anxiety that I have been trying to work through and I have been getting some support and it has been helping. At times, it has definitely taken a large toll on me and my work and social life. I definitely know that feeling of not wanting to tell anyone. We think we need to be tough and independent and try to fight our battles alone because we don't want anyone else to worry about us (at least that's sometimes how i feel) or we fear that other will judge us. Some of the things that have helped me are CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) that I learned through group counselling and meditation. 

I think one of the reasons why some people are uncomfortable around it is just because there are so many different reasons for why someone can be suffering and if they don't see the whole picture then they won't understand. Finally talking to someone was one of the best things I could do.  If you ever feel up to it, I would highly recommend talking to someone you trust in person. There are a lot of really good people and services out there that are willing to help out.

 

Most importantly, never give up. I am definitely rooting for you and you have The Weasel in your corner. 

[LaBamba]

When ever I'm depressed, I say to myself, "at least it's not -40 below outside." But when it is -40 below outside, I'm inconsolable. 

I also like to go on YouTube and find funny stuff to watch. A good laugh at some redneck lighting his privates on fire always helps, or something like that. 

[on the cycle]

Today I had a breakdown and couldn't control myself. I haven't had a breakdown for over 6 months. This was the final thing that made me make this thread. I can't point to one reason why I broke down. I had overwhelming anxiety and went through sadness, stress, worry, and even frustrated laughter.

If you or anyone needs to talk just PM me.

[thejazz97]

I've been struggling with depression for about 5 years as well.

I've been suicidal in the past (5 years ago), or wanting to die but not willing to commit (2 years ago).

Today I was in church and I had to leave the room for a few minutes because I couldn't handle being around the people.

[Alflives]

I think it's a lot about accepting who you are.  It's okay to get the flu, or break a toe.  It's just as okay to openly admit to a mental illness.  I think too many of us (men mostly) carry around mental illness like a giant weight around our necks.  It's with us constantly - dragging us down.  I had that ball weighing me down for many years.  I finally freed myself by first being honest with myself.  I have a mental illness.  Then I was honest with everyone I knew or met - who asked.  It's been several years now of total freedom.  When someone tells me they fell free for expressing honesty about some aspect of their life, I understand completely their experience.  If you are feeling downcast remember it's okay to have those feelings - it's human.  Accept all your feelings as a representation of who you are.  

I try and live by a simple mantra: accept, respect, trust, and love all of creation - including yourself.

[bigbadcanucks]

Today I had a breakdown and couldn't control myself. I haven't had a breakdown for over 6 months. This was the final thing that made me make this thread. I can't point to one reason why I broke down. I had overwhelming anxiety and went through sadness, stress, worry, and even frustrated laughter.

If you or anyone needs to talk just PM me.

I'm not qualified to comment in your thread, but if I may say so, in the midst of your struggles, you found the courage to share a part of your life story with me (us) and you have created a thread to help others who are struggling with similar challenges as you...there is power in what you've done and I applaud you for that. 

I spend time as a volunteer prepping/serving food and distributing clothes to those who have been marginalized by society for whatever reason, and initially, I thought I was the one giving...after having done this for three years, I realize that I am the beneficiary of the fellowship that is shared with these kind and gentle souls who have gone from being faceless statistics to being friends who feed my spirit.  My point in writing this is, that by you sharing what you think is a weakness, I am (we are) receiving because of your strength.  God bless you for reaching out and giving me (us) the gift of your courage.

CDC can be a place for heated exchanges when it comes to hockey and other topical issues, but you will always have my support and admiration as you deal with your emotional, mental and spiritual health. 

[Guest]

I've dealt with depression on and off for most of my life. I've gone through feeling worthless to wishing I was dead more than once. Looking in the mirror at myself thinking that I was going insane or something.

I've talked to friends and family about it, professionals about it, and done lots of research online about it. I've come to a point in the last year to where I've accepted that is probably going to stay with me for my entire life, and that it's part of who I am. I feel like accepting it has helped me a lot. 

It's okay to have bad days, to be emotional. Be gentle with yourself, and know that it's alright to feel how you feel, and that it isn't your fault. It doesn't make you weak or a bad person.

[Ryanstorm]

Too many @$$#0!3Z on here to talk about personal issues, imo. but props for trying to be helpful lol

[HC20.0]

Good thread man.... Thank you. Really, thank you. I had a verbally abusive father growing up, as well as alcoholic grandparents and a very broken up family. Largely because of my childhood, I struggle very heavily with clinical depression and social anxiety both. It's a huge struggle for me just to stay positive about anything, and having a dead end job isn't helping. What I find hardest though is being able to talk to people about it. I don't want to admit to people that I struggle, that I see a counselor, or that I have a messed up family. I'm... well, I'm afraid of being looked at or being treated differently. I've told my girlfriend, and she's loving and very supportive of me, but at the same time, now she sorta treats me like I'm fragile. I couldn't take that if everyone treated me that way. I bottle it up inside to avoid rejection, but it only makes the hurt worse.

[Master Mind]

I applaud you for making this thread. So many people deal with mental health issues, but are unwilling to open up due to the stigma and/or a lack of support.

Hopefully with more people discussing it, others will follow. I think the good of people will show here, which is something I don't think I could say about most other forms of social media.

I wish you, and everyone else, all the best in overcoming any struggles you may be facing. No shame in trying to better yourself.

 

[NucksCelts]

I have struggled with depression, and anxiety for almost all of my life. Anxiety is mostly social, but doesn't cripple me that bad. The depression on the other hand has made life very difficult from time to time.

 

I want to say my clinical depression is caused by a combination of genetics, and my environment. Childhood trauma, adulthood trauma... I have certain triggers that make it flare up really bad. After struggling for a long time I decided to do therapy. I did talk therapy for about 5 years. It helped me out of slumps, but that's it. I then tried EMDR trauma therapy for my diagnosed PTSD. It got me out of a really bad place that I was in. Unfortunately it wasn't completely long term either. I eventually ended up doing CBT therapy. It has completely changed my life. Re wiring the way my though process works, and how I react to situations has been huge in fighting the depression. 

 

Fighting depression sucks, but there's always help, there's always support, and there's always treatment. People need to start seeing depression as an illness, and not as a weakness. Are you weak for going to the doctor when you have cancer? Are you weak for having a heart attack? No. So why is mental illness a weakness. It's silly. 

[surtur]

20 years of depression for me. Basically since age 11

Tried the meds they work in some ways but not exactly suited to my situation.

I eat better now and  it helps but every day is a struggle did the therapy counciling deal also but no big improvements.

I believe that I am naturally a depressive person it is part of mypersonality. Obviously lots of ups and downs but I have grown to accept who I am and to not over think things because it's never as bad as you think it is in the moment. Best thing you can ever do is waiting out when things get bad because the next day or week you will look back and think to your self it wasn't really that bad.

If it gets bad enough call a crisis line,  call a close friend,  talk to a parent ( as long as they are not part of the problem and are supportive of you) worst case talk to your dog/ cat or CDC.  I had a dog who helped me get through the worst times it was as if all I needed was something that relies on me in order for me to not take things to far. Now I have kids and no matter how bad things get I know I will always be there for them so I can't get to down on myself.

I had a friend in school kill himself after arguing with his dad. He tried calling friends to talk to them and no one was home if only someone was there to talk he might still be here. 

Talking about it is never a bad idea.

If anyone ever talks down or makes fun because of it they do not belong in your circle of friends/family  

Also I am sure I could have be more successful in life if I was not suffering from clinical depression but I feel I have done well for myself considering I have adhd,  high anxiety,  dyslexia, obsessive compulsive, an addictive personality and a general hatred towards people. On top of depression. But I am half way through this life and see no reason to stop now.

[surtur]

I have struggled with depression, and anxiety for almost all of my life. Anxiety is mostly social, but doesn't cripple me that bad. The depression on the other hand has made life very difficult from time to time.

 

I want to say my clinical depression is caused by a combination of genetics, and my environment. Childhood trauma, adulthood trauma... I have certain triggers that make it flare up really bad. After struggling for a long time I decided to do therapy. I did talk therapy for about 5 years. It helped me out of slumps, but that's it. I then tried EMDR trauma therapy for my diagnosed PTSD. It got me out of a really bad place that I was in. Unfortunately it wasn't completely long term either. I eventually ended up doing CBT therapy. It has completely changed my life. Re wiring the way my though process works, and how I react to situations has been huge in fighting the depression. 

 

Fighting depression sucks, but there's always help, there's always support, and there's always treatment. People need to start seeing depression as an illness, and not as a weakness. Are you weak for going to the doctor when you have cancer? Are you weak for having a heart attack? No. So why is mental illness a weakness. It's silly. 

what is cbt therapy? 

[NucksCelts]

what is cbt therapy? 

Cognitive behavioral therapy. It essentially is a way of re wiring the pathways in your brain. Say when you have a bad day at work, you have the tendency to get depressed and feel the same negative way. Well using CBT is a strategy of changing the pathways that make you act and think certain ways. The best way to describe it is depression is just a symptom that takes hostage of your brain. Through this treatment it allows you to take back the control of your brain. It's a very simple explanation. It takes a lot of work. Unfortunately with trauma counselling it takes A LOT of being uncomfortable, and unhappiness to get through. 

[Guest]

I bottle it up inside to avoid rejection, but it only makes the hurt worse.

I've started to do that too, I don't like being asked about how I'm doing and stuff like that. Even though I know it's only because people care, I find that it stresses me out for some reason.

I tell the same few people, or talk/read online about it. 

[elvis15]

Good thread man.... Thank you. Really, thank you. I had a verbally abusive father growing up, as well as alcoholic grandparents and a very broken up family. Largely because of my childhood, I struggle very heavily with clinical depression and social anxiety both. It's a huge struggle for me just to stay positive about anything, and having a dead end job isn't helping. What I find hardest though is being able to talk to people about it. I don't want to admit to people that I struggle, that I see a counselor, or that I have a messed up family. I'm... well, I'm afraid of being looked at or being treated differently. I've told my girlfriend, and she's loving and very supportive of me, but at the same time, now she sorta treats me like I'm fragile. I couldn't take that if everyone treated me that way. I bottle it up inside to avoid rejection, but it only makes the hurt worse.

As someone whose wife deals with depression, it's not always easy to know if how you're responding is right. I know I'm happier knowing if what I'm doing is helpful or not, and she's been great at letting me know so I don't treat her like a porcelain doll. I still want to just hold her and all that when she feels poorly, but your girlfriend sounds like she'll be supportive if you help her out with what you do and don't like.

My biggest thing was learning to recognize signs. My wife again has been excellent there, as she's very much aware of what those are and how she's feeling (unfortunately just powerless to change it). I just be supportive and help her out that little bit extra so she doesn't have to concentrate on mundane things.

She's done counselling (which made things a little worse before they got better as she had unresolved issues) and neural (neuro?) feedback, which she's found quite helpful. After a number of years of trying she's figured out a good balance of meds as well and feels 'normal' a lot more now. Normal isn't the right word though, as she's had a rough patch this weekend and asked me why she isn't normal, to which of course I reminded her that there is no such thing really and she is great in so many ways. Doesn't fix it, but sometimes she wants to hear it.

I have other friends affected (with both depression and anxiety) and each have their own things that help them, so it's important for people to realize there is no one fix and no amount of trying to make a person dealing with mental health issues happy. Be supportive, but treat them normally because they really aren't any different. It's not really that far off of how you'd treat someone if they got sick (as it is an illness) and you had to make sure they were eating and had medical help if necessary. You wouldn't be forcing someone with a cold to go to a party or something to try and cheer them up, so why do it with someone depressed?

But OP, while we've had a few threads over the years on depression, another is always a good idea if people need to talk about it.

As has been said if it gets bad talk to someone, anyone, even calling the help lines if you aren't comfortable with someone you know. If you think you might harm yourself go straight to emergency and tell them as they will admit you (and hopefully have a counselor at least on staff) to help and give you a plan to assist in dealing with what's happening once you feel ok to leave.

[TheFirstLine]

Didn't know this many posters are either suffering or know people that are suffering with depression, very surprising.

[thejazz97]

Didn't know this many posters are either suffering or know people that are suffering with depression, very surprising.

I don't know the numbers, but I'd say that there's more people with depression now than ever before. There's a lot of contributing factors, so I won't blame any one thing, but it's good to have things like this where we can share and encourage each other. 

[Sean Monahan]

Didn't know this many posters are either suffering or know people that are suffering with depression, very surprising.

I don't know the numbers, but I'd say that there's more people with depression now than ever before. There's a lot of contributing factors, so I won't blame any one thing, but it's good to have things like this where we can share and encourage each other. 

I spent a few months in the adolescent psych ward at Children's when I was 13 and I remember being told that if you were to walk down the hallway of your average BC public high school 30% of the kids could be treated for some sort of affliction, anything from generalized anxiety to schizophrenia. Unfortunately, mental illness is much more prevalent than you'd think.