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if gary bettman read cdc


Twilight Sparkle

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the intellectual minds of cdc have gary bettman's attention for 5 minutes. maybe he's making paper airplanes and watching youtube videos of how to make origami cranes, until some nhl executive walks in, and is like "sir, data gathered that nhl.com/canucks forums (yes, the exec. literally said nhl dot com slash canucks) has the most traffic, and nhl.com home page is getting the most clicks from that one domain."

 

gary bettman tries to raises an eyebrow, but fails, because both his eyebrows are raised

 

"sir, i don't know what you're doing" says the nhl executive

 

"i'm raising an eyebrow in interest." replies gary.

 

"okay... uhh, sir, there seems to be unrest on this forum. it seems that you're not... your approval has shown to be very poor. one user compared you to... the devil, sir..."

 

"h-wut? i've never heard of this 'the devil' let me log on here... oh my... oh no! smithers, why didn't you tell me of this market crash!"

 

the nhl executive looks at gary, dumbfounded "what?!"

 

gary bettman has a change of heart and decides to reach out to the loyal canucks fans by making an account on cdc

 

GudGuyGary makes his first post on cdc. how do you respond o:

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19 minutes ago, Art Vandelay said:

Delete the shootout Mr. Bettman. 

GudGuyGary: the nhl was mutilated, and vangaurd-1 is missing. when i had a vision for the nhl, i saw the shootout in a movie, with ducks. the magic; then and i was to create, a hockey league. i lifted it, out of this chair, with wheels and i walked it into the lake of reincarnation and i asked the 7 deities to regenerate the league of its deadly wounds. NHL regenerate! i will render this old league obsolete! delete!

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25 minutes ago, Twilight Sparkle said:

GudGuyGary: the nhl was mutilated, and vangaurd-1 is missing. when i had a vision for the nhl, i saw the shootout in a movie, with ducks. the magic; then and i was to create, a hockey league. i lifted it, out of this chair, with wheels and i walked it into the lake of reincarnation and i asked the 7 deities to regenerate the league of its deadly wounds. NHL regenerate! i will render this old league obsolete! delete!

Definitely not a fan of this scoundrel, TS..as you prob well-know

 

Wrote a limerick(3, or 4 mos ago?) about someone shavin a dog's fuzzy butt, & teachin the hound to walk backwards. NY media mistake the approaching creature for Gary Buttman, who always has something wasteful to spew outa his maw.

 

I guess that summarizes lots of Cdn-feelings on this snake-oil scheister.

 

Yank $$$ & cultural bullying(replete w/Napoleon complex, lil lawyers), destroyed a league that was so beautiful, back in the day(70's & 80's mostly). Won't ever forget.

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1 minute ago, Nuxfanabroad said:

Definitely not a fan of this scoundrel, TS..as you prob well-know

 

Wrote a limerick(3, or 4 mos ago?) about someone shavin a dog's fuzzy butt, & teachin the hound to walk backwards. NY media mistake the approaching creature for Gary Buttman, who always has something wasteful to spew outa his maw.

 

I guess that summarizes lots of Cdn-feelings on this snake-oil scheister.

 

Yank $$$ & cultural bullying(replete w/Napoleon complex, lil lawyers), destroyed a league that was so beautiful, back in the day(70's & 80's mostly). Won't ever forget.

GudGuyGary: neexfanabod, i've gone my entire career being a new york times cartoon character, but understand, the changing of the times. it's unacceptable of such barbaric nature of 1970's hockey in 2017. there were fewer sponsors back then, and that's who we cater to- the powers that be. "they" want violence cut from the game. i love watching the thrones of games and watch main characters get deleted as much as the next guy, but if not for me, there wouldn't be an nhl right now, and you'd be watching some russian league more ****ed than i!

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21 minutes ago, MikeyBoy44 said:

Please explain shotty hockey market decisions. Kthxbi

GudGuyGary: what you call "shotty hockey market decisions" meaning making this league as relevant as its ever been, then guilty as charged! who talked about nhl during the wayne gretzky era? no one. it was all that nba guy in the late 80's, you know, the guy from space jam? then mike tyson and guys like john elway, celtics and lakers? the only time in the 80's hockey was mentioned was some miracle that happened. then enter me

 

i give you people the gift of bettman. DRINK IT IN, MAAAN

 

10 minutes ago, Nuxfanabroad said:

Sorry, TS, but you're speakin for the Devil! Your ultimate challenge for creative writing?!

 

Sleepy tonite(long day)..will try tom...

GudGuyGary: I am not  the devil! reported.

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Gary, remember the Luongo Rule...that was straight up actual corruption.

Show me another case anywhere where someone's allowed to penalize someone else retroactively for acting according to rules you wrote and then deemed admissible after inspection.

Gary, you've cost your owners the Aquilini's maybe $50-$100 million in lost value and revenue, the team is in a much worse place than it would have been if not for your corruption. We want that stolen value back Gary.

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5 hours ago, Twilight Sparkle said:

GudGuyGary: the nhl was mutilated, and vangaurd-1 is missing. when i had a vision for the nhl, i saw the shootout in a movie, with ducks. the magic; then and i was to create, a hockey league. i lifted it, out of this chair, with wheels and i walked it into the lake of reincarnation and i asked the 7 deities to regenerate the league of its deadly wounds. NHL regenerate! i will render this old league obsolete! delete!

tumblr_oa8dlmjyyo1u1ljrzo3_500.gif?w=900

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