confessions

[Qwags]

6 minutes ago, Twilight Sparkle said:

cuz flygon <3

[canuck204]

On 12/23/2016 at 10:18 PM, babych said:

lol, try 20 and then realizing this.. you're ahead of the game, my friend

 

Yeah man, that's my biggest fear at this point. I don't even know if I should be giving anyone the chance to do that. This all probably has something to with my abandonment issues when I was a kid. I want someone to be close with like all of us do, but I'm scared to let someone in that close because of my fear of being abandoned again. Bruh.

 

THANKS MOM 

[AppleJack]

Due to Medical reasons I am on leave from work till January 5 where we will be doing gradual re- entry (so like 1 day a week then 2 days a week then so on) my employer didn't realize she had to register for a ROE when she first hired me and so is now in the process of doing so. My medical issue came on very sudden and sadly unexpected and so I had just started this new job like three weeks before having to go on Medical Leave. We are having such a hard time getting the information she needs so she can file my ROE electronically and It can potentially delay my claim. I actually have enough hours with my previous job to go on Medical EI but EI  won't let me just use those hours because its against policy or some crap like that. I am beyond frustrated because now I may not get my claim processed until the middle of January and we are kind of poor and its just adding extra stress that neither one of us need.

 

To make matters worse I only work part time with this particular employer. So I kind of need to be able to switch to normal EI when I am cleared to return to work full time. I had another job that I was due to start on December 12 but because of this medical issue  I was fired from that job before it even started. I basically was fired because I wasn't allowed to lift and carry their heavy double stroller down a flight of stairs and had asked them if they could just do it for me in the morning but that was deemed to much to ask and so I was let go. I do know that they turned out to be the kind of people I wouldn't want to work for anyways (especially since we are trying for a baby) but it still was beyond annoying. I turned down another job that would have been more money but less hours to take this particular job because I felt that I had a connection with their children and it ended up screwing me over.

 

I am in the process of talking to EI to see if they can do anything for me but I highly doubt it.

 

 

Edited December 28, 2016 by AppleJack

[Cramarossa]

I suffer from a handful of undiagnosed and untreated yet readily apparent mental illnesses and cognitive abnormalities, and spend most of my days in intense amounts of emotional distress. I have surprisingly put together a pretty successful life (college educated, good job, good boyfriend, money/opportunity to do things I like, cute kitties, etc.) and yet on at least 300 out of 365 days in the year I feel utterly hopeless. 

[ReggieBush]

8 hours ago, ThrustyPrusty89 said:

I suffer from a handful of undiagnosed and untreated yet readily apparent mental illnesses and cognitive abnormalities, and spend most of my days in intense amounts of emotional distress. I have surprisingly put together a pretty successful life (college educated, good job, good boyfriend, money/opportunity to do things I like, cute kitties, etc.) and yet on at least 300 out of 365 days in the year I feel utterly hopeless. 

 

That sounds absolutely horrible. I can't even imagine that I have so much respect for you. None the less You are in my prayers.

[Gurn]

9 hours ago, ThrustyPrusty89 said:

I suffer from a handful of undiagnosed and untreated yet readily apparent mental illnesses and cognitive abnormalities, and spend most of my days in intense amounts of emotional distress. I have surprisingly put together a pretty successful life (college educated, good job, good boyfriend, money/opportunity to do things I like, cute kitties, etc.) and yet on at least 300 out of 365 days in the year I feel utterly hopeless. 

Is it a feeling of Hopelessness or powerlessness? It seems a subtle distinction, but it is important. There are treatments and counseling available to help with either of these. These feelings could be related to actual clinical depression.

 Please consult a doctor, human lives are too short to be hurting for that many days of a year. Good luck.

[ShakyWalton]

9 hours ago, ThrustyPrusty89 said:

I suffer from a handful of undiagnosed and untreated yet readily apparent mental illnesses and cognitive abnormalities, and spend most of my days in intense amounts of emotional distress. I have surprisingly put together a pretty successful life (college educated, good job, good boyfriend, money/opportunity to do things I like, cute kitties, etc.) and yet on at least 300 out of 365 days in the year I feel utterly hopeless. 

Sounds very debilitating ,,when you say undiagnosed and untreated it leads me to believe that you haven't had help on this unless you have and they cant come up with an appropriate remedy...talk to your BF and family..its good to have help....but don't let it fester...depression is a bummer.

[Cramarossa]

2 hours ago, ReggieBush said:

That sounds absolutely horrible. I can't even imagine that I have so much respect for you. None the less You are in my prayers.

Thank you. 

 

2 hours ago, gurn said:

Is it a feeling of Hopelessness or powerlessness? It seems a subtle distinction, but it is important. There are treatments and counseling available to help with either of these. These feelings could be related to actual clinical depression.

 Please consult a doctor, human lives are too short to be hurting for that many days of a year. Good luck.

It's hopelessness. I do believe I have the power to get through it. Some days are definitely better than others. I will have new health insurance starting 1/1 and have been looking forward to finally getting some help, only to discover that my new insurer has an awful track record with treating mental health issues. One of my big issues is anxiety, and I've been banking on my insurance being able to help me with this. Now my anxiety is flaring up because my plan is going to have to change and I'm going to need to do more research to get help on my own.

 

1 hour ago, ShakyWalton said:

Sounds very debilitating ,,when you say undiagnosed and untreated it leads me to believe that you haven't had help on this unless you have and they cant come up with an appropriate remedy...talk to your BF and family..its good to have help....but don't let it fester...depression is a bummer.

I I'm going to try and get help. It sounds silly, but I honestly didn't realize I had a problem until this year. A lot of my problems (bizarre phobias, intrusive thoughts, anxiety and depression) got dramatically worse within the last few months. It's been sort of a sticking point in my relationship, and only after talking to my boyfriend and a couple other friends about it did I realize that not everybody goes through the extreme mood changes, bouts of anxiety and depression, crippling fears and obsessive thought patterns that I do. I truly didn't realize (most?) other people didn't feel the same way. So now along with all those problems I feel shame and embarrassment for feeling different- for being different- and not even realizing it for 26 years.

[ShakyWalton]

3 hours ago, ThrustyPrusty89 said:

Thank you. 

 

It's hopelessness. I do believe I have the power to get through it. Some days are definitely better than others. I will have new health insurance starting 1/1 and have been looking forward to finally getting some help, only to discover that my new insurer has an awful track record with treating mental health issues. One of my big issues is anxiety, and I've been banking on my insurance being able to help me with this. Now my anxiety is flaring up because my plan is going to have to change and I'm going to need to do more research to get help on my own.

 

I I'm going to try and get help. It sounds silly, but I honestly didn't realize I had a problem until this year. A lot of my problems (bizarre phobias, intrusive thoughts, anxiety and depression) got dramatically worse within the last few months. It's been sort of a sticking point in my relationship, and only after talking to my boyfriend and a couple other friends about it did I realize that not everybody goes through the extreme mood changes, bouts of anxiety and depression, crippling fears and obsessive thought patterns that I do. I truly didn't realize (most?) other people didn't feel the same way. So now along with all those problems I feel shame and embarrassment for feeling different- for being different- and not even realizing it for 26 years.

nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about at all...try to get someone to listen to your feelings...I'm sure you will feel better and not so alone.

[Tearloch7]

There are several types of meditation that may help, Thrusty ..  remember, you are not alone ..  reaching out is a great 'first' step ..  God bless ..

[RWMc1]

3 hours ago, ThrustyPrusty89 said:

Thank you. 

 

It's hopelessness. I do believe I have the power to get through it. Some days are definitely better than others. I will have new health insurance starting 1/1 and have been looking forward to finally getting some help, only to discover that my new insurer has an awful track record with treating mental health issues. One of my big issues is anxiety, and I've been banking on my insurance being able to help me with this. Now my anxiety is flaring up because my plan is going to have to change and I'm going to need to do more research to get help on my own.

 

I I'm going to try and get help. It sounds silly, but I honestly didn't realize I had a problem until this year. A lot of my problems (bizarre phobias, intrusive thoughts, anxiety and depression) got dramatically worse within the last few months. It's been sort of a sticking point in my relationship, and only after talking to my boyfriend and a couple other friends about it did I realize that not everybody goes through the extreme mood changes, bouts of anxiety and depression, crippling fears and obsessive thought patterns that I do. I truly didn't realize (most?) other people didn't feel the same way. So now along with all those problems I feel shame and embarrassment for feeling different- for being different- and not even realizing it for 26 years.

It's true that not everyone deals with those or similar issues, but there are many people who do. You are not alone and there are options out there. If your health insurance won't help, then you should seek a support group. It helps a lot to share with others who have similar symptoms and who can relate to you and your situation. They may also know of alternative treatment options. Anyway, good luck to you. 

[Cramarossa]

In spite of myself I have an ever-increasing fondness for the Stockton Heat (Calgary Flames AHL affiliate) I don't want to like them for obvious reasons, but I can't help but love having pro hockey so close to where I live. The games are affordable and fun, and the team is actually pretty good. I even get to see Shink and Vey  I starting going to their games just to see the Tucson Roadrunners (who I adore), but now I am going to games just for the sake of going. I am even considering season tix or a ticket package for next year.

[riffraff]

Christmas is over but I'm missing the sweets and baked goods.

[brilac]

6 minutes ago, riffraff said:

Christmas is over but I'm missing the sweets and baked goods.

I am too!  I am snacking on the chocolates as I type this.  I have a really big box of Russell Stover that I got for Christmas, and Ghirardelli Peppermint bark squares in milk chocolate and dark chocolate.  But, I'm cutting back.  I am going to use the treadmill pretty soon.

[riffraff]

4 minutes ago, brilac said:

I am too!  I am snacking on the chocolates as I type this.  I have a really big box of Russell Stover that I got for Christmas, and Ghirardelli Peppermint bark squares in milk chocolate and dark chocolate.  But, I'm cutting back.  I am going to use the treadmill pretty soon.

 

Yeah.  Chocolates have taken over my life.  It's the not so perfect storm.  I have an ankle injury at Christmas.  Can't exercise.  Will have some work to do in a month or so.  Yikes!

[thejazz97]

Funny, I was just about to post how life is feeling empty and directionless lonely and then I saw @ThrustyPrusty89's post.

 

Thrusty, you're not alone. And I guess I'm not either.  

[Cramarossa]

1 hour ago, thejazz97 said:

Funny, I was just about to post how life is feeling empty and directionless lonely and then I saw @ThrustyPrusty89's post.

 

Thrusty, you're not alone. And I guess I'm not either.  

We just have to have faith that it'll get better...and then we must follow through with hard work to make it so.

[ShakyWalton]

45 minutes ago, ThrustyPrusty89 said:

We just have to have faith that it'll get better...and then we must follow through with hard work to make it so.

[brilac]

Oh my, sometimes I think I watch a little much of the Bachelor. I sit there and eat my Candy Cane Hershey Kisses while Googling when Americans can travel to Cuba. It's time to hit the treadmill now. I've ate too much Candy Cane Hershey Kisses.

[Master 112]

I think the internet is going to gradually drive us all insane. We're heading toward a global crisis of some kind strictly because of it. We won't see it coming until it hits us. Quote me.