Would you date me?

[chon derry]

were canuck hockey fan's talkin hockey, most of us to some degree are probably ignoring our wive's or girl friend's , so this is probably the last place on earth you should ask for advice.

[Twilight Sparkle]

1 minute ago, JC2 said:

Thanks for respectful reply. When I say I don't go out much I mean in the sense that I prefer home most nights but do like going out like say the movies or out to eat. I don't like clubs or anything and I am open to new things but I so feel more comfortable at home. Going out slot I'd expensive and I would prefer a woman who likes being in my company rather than a crowd.

well in that case, you're good to go. if you need cdc to tell you if you're datable or not, says something about the kind of friends (if any?) you have. you have a job, working on a ride, you're honest (i think) it's just down to you being confident in who you are, going out and making it happen. as jr said, volunteer for something-- something involving outside

 

1 minute ago, JC2 said:

That's good advice but I'm a shy guy and admittingly I'm not into the volunteer thing. I'm not an anti social person but I do feel uncomfortable in crowds of people and don't consider myself a people person. I admit I can be hard to get to know but I'm not judging in any way and just want someone who likes me for who I am.

i'm actually the same way. i'm pretty reserved, rarely ever through my hat into the crowd, but we all have to face our demons and not let "i'm shy, i don't know how i would talk to her" control us. eventually you'll develop a better personality from taking that chance, going through rejection and learning from it

[JC2]

5 minutes ago, chon derry said:

were canuck hockey fan's talkin hockey, most of us to some degree are probably ignoring our wive's or girl friend's , so this is probably the last place on earth you should ask for advice.

You are very right and like I said I have no expectation of finding a partner on a forum, let alone the canucks forum. I just got out of a relationship which ended suddenly and like I said I'm not very social and I never pictured myself making this kind of post but I figured what the hell. The advantage of the Internet is you can anonymously make yourself look like a fool lol .

[hlinkas wrister]

11 minutes ago, Gooseberries said:

I would date this guy so hard. If I wasn't dating half of the population of cdcs mothers. You know who you are. 

My mom is 73. Pics or it didn't happen.

[73 Percent]

1 minute ago, hlinkas wrister said:

My mom is 73. Pics or it didn't happen.

Go to bed son.

 

 

 

Jk. I dont want to step on any parent feels  :/

[JC2]

14 minutes ago, Twilight Sparkle said:

well in that case, you're good to go. if you need cdc to tell you if you're datable or not, says something about the kind of friends (if any?) you have. you have a job, working on a ride, you're honest (i think) it's just down to you being confident in who you are, going out and making it happen. as jr said, volunteer for something-- something involving outside

 

i'm actually the same way. i'm pretty reserved, rarely ever through my hat into the crowd, but we all have to face our demons and not let "i'm shy, i don't know how i would talk to her" control us. eventually you'll develop a better personality from taking that chance, going through rejection and learning from it

Thank you again for the response. I am a very honest guy, in fact I can be too honest sometimes but I think being honest is the best way to go. I have just ended a relationship because neither me nor the woman was willing to change who we are. I'm a far from perfect guy and my shyness and laziness are definitely some of my grey spots but I feel like I have a lot to offer someone who is willing to accept me for who I am.

[Riviera82]

Looks like your'e a bit of a late bloomer but that's ok. In my opinion if you want to get some attention from girls then it's important to get your own pad; living with the parents at 24 isn't very cool. Get that drivers licence and get yourself a ride and do it soon; taking your date somewhere on the bus is also pretty lame. Finally, be a bit more open-minded to having a few drinks now and then. If you're a little shy then a couple of adult beverages can go a long way in curbing that shyness and making you appear more confident, and confidence is a big deal with women. Just my two cents, good luck.

[Cerridwen]

As it looks like I’m the only one of female persuasion to respond thus far, I have to say that Odd, JR and TS have some very good advice and comments for you. You are very ‘datable’.....it’s just that much more  difficult to meet someone or have others meet YOU when you are spending your time at home. Being shy/introverted is difficult to overcome but honestly, you have to get out there.....start with volunteering somewhere you’re comfortable (or most not uncomfortable)....that way you’ll have some measure of confidence in what you’re doing and have a topic of common interest to talk about with any women you meet there.

 

That said, sometimes you will meet that special someone in the most unexpected of places, too!

 

 

Best of luck! 

[ForsbergTheGreat]

This response my sound hard but it’s the truth.  The world is competitive market.  You have to really think, what you can you offer that someone else can’t?  You don’t have a car, house, or a real job and by the sounds of it you seem like you’re comfortable in this living environment, so low ambition.   These things aren’t just materialistic items that make a person shallow in wanting, they are a sign that you’re a grown up.   At 25 most girls are starting to look for a relationship that could lead to marriage/kids, and they want to meet a man, not a boy that they themselves would have to take care. 

 

Obviously isn’t not easy to move out, not everyone financially can do that, but get yourself on the path that shows someday you will be able to support yourself.  You might have to get a different job, go back to school or put in extra hours to build up your resume, but girls will want to see that you actually have a plan in place.  They don’t want to be dragged down with you. It’s not about money, it’s about being able to take care of yourself. 

 

I really suggest thinking about a 5 year plan, what do you want accomplished? Give yourself goals, then plan out the steps on how you are going to accomplish it.  Maybe 5 years isn’t enough time to reach your goal but at least get the plan in place.  If your goal is to still being a stock boy at Walmart while living with your parents, then, you’re going to have a hard time finding a girl who will want to join you on that path. 

 

 

It also really depends on what kind of relationship you’re looking for.  Fling vs meaningful long term relationship are different. 

 

I'd really suggest getting a post secondary education. it's a good way to kill two birds with one stone.  Start on the path to better job/career and it's a great way to meet a partner.

[CaptainBobbyLou]

1 hour ago, JC2 said:

Hello fellow canuck fans, I'm not going to state My name for obvious reasons and to be honest I don't know why I am doing this but I figure what the hell.

 

I'm a white guy, 24 years old and I live at home. I do not have my license, but I'm working on it, and I work at walmart as a stocker. I'm a very quiet person with basically no social life but I consider myself a nice guy. I don't smoke or do drugs and don't drink. I have a soft spot for animals and I consider myself a family guy. I'm what you would call boring. I prefer to stay indoors mostly and love watching movies and playing video games. I look for an attractive woman, by no means a supermodel but someone I can be attracted to. Someone down to earth and not looking for money, just someone who is loyal and will care for them.

 

Now to those who actually respond please know I'm not really asking for a date here. I'm just want to know if any women out there find a guy like me interesting in any way. Please be kind but be honest too. Thanks.

 

It's real hard mang. I have a career, good looks, I go out, and money in the bank. However I do live at home and it seems to put me in a bad spot because nearly every girl I tell I live at home they lose interest it seems.

[Ghostsof1915]

Find a hobby that mixes with people. Rock climbing, dancing, take a cooking class, art, music, dragon boat racing, tai chi.

 

BTW my Mom is deceased, and cremated for longer than I've been on here. So I think your ratio is a bit off there Gooseberries. 

[Jiggs50]

You're probably dateable but you gotta get out of the house to meet girls. Gotta make yourself available man! 

[falcon45ca]

Gotta be honest, if you're in your mid 20's and still have the 'rents for roommates and no car, it's going to be harder than not to find a good lookin' gal who's into that. 

 

No fish is just gonna jump in the boat, you've gotta do a lot of the work yourself.

[Tortorella's Rant]

Would you date me? I'd date me. I'd date me hard.

[taxi]

Generally women don't necessarily care about success/money (although some do), but they want a partner who is passionate about what they do and has goals. You have to remember that when you get into a relationship with someone you are really hitching your wagon to them. 

 

If a woman wants to have a family/kids someday, who is she going to accomplish that with a partner who works at Walmart and lives with their parents. If she just wants to have a good time, how is she going to accomplish that with a guy with no hobbies who just wants to sit in his parents basement and play video games.

 

The pool your limiting yourself to is very small right now. You are looking for an attractive woman who plays video games and doesn't have long term goals. The means you've limited yourself to finding your partner are also very small. This woman isn't just going to walk into your parent's basement. 

 

I do know guys like you've who've found great partners. They usually either have great personalities or are just really devouted to their partners. 

 

Honestly, I'd suggest online dating. It'll at least give you some exposure to the opposite sex, post-high school. You'll also find a lot girls online who aren't into clubs. A lot of women hate clubs too. Just don't act like you're only into the date for the sex and do your best to convey that you want something long term. 

[Glory_Days]

Guys and girls have different checklists.

 

Lot of guys don't mind if a girl is living with her parents when she's in her early-mid twenties, or that she doesn't drive.

Lot of girls won't date a guy if they are still living with their parents at the same age, even if they happen to be as well, same with not being able to drive.

 

You sound like a good, decent guy, but your situation would be improved a lot if you did at least one of;

A ) Move out of your parents house

 

B ) Get your license and a car

 

C ) Figure out where you're going to be 4-5 years down the road, go back to school maybe and upgrade your education, or depending on your education, go straight into a college/university/tech institute, or try to get a better job than at Wal-Mart or a second job (Not dissing your job, just making a living off Wal-Mart employees wages is nigh impossible)

 

D ) Start going out a bit more, know you said you're uncomfortable in larger groups and don't like the club/bar scene, lots of other activities you can do though. Start going to the gym, not to make yourself look more attractive, but for yourself, you'll feel better and have more confidence in yourself.

 

I was kind of in the same boat as you, minus living at home. It helps if you have some form of catalyst to set you off, mine was a girl that I loved...I mean, she ended up destroying my soul in the end and just leaving an empty, shattered, hollow husk behind...anyyyyyyyywho, you're already on your way with trying to get your license.

 

Last tidbit, confidence is such a key factor in women finding you attractive. Confidence pretty much trumps everything else a women seeks in a partner.

[jdatb]

59 minutes ago, ForsbergTheGreat said:

I'd really suggest getting a post secondary education. it's a good way to kill two birds with one stone.  Start on the path to better job/career and it's a great way to meet a partner.

Depends on the major, of course. Solid advice, though.

[King Heffy]

You aren't dateable with the attitude you're conveying on here.  Most of the obstacles you have can be overcome with a little thought other than the whole living with the parents thing.  As for no car, just invite potential dates for drinks.  The question shouldn't even come up then as no one should expect you to drink and drive.  Work on improving your situation all around, but have more confidence in yourself. 

 

You're going to get rejected a lot regardless.  The more it happens, the less you'll care.  Keep at it and it won't bother you at all and may even give you a sense of amusement.

[Gstank29]

1 hour ago, CaptainBobbyLou said:

It's real hard mang. I have a career, good looks, I go out, and money in the bank. However I do live at home and it seems to put me in a bad spot because nearly every girl I tell I live at home they lose interest it seems.

This is because they see you as unambitious and lazy when you stil live at home, yet when they do the same thing its deemed they are caring. Double standards, just one of the many that occurs in society.

 

Also if you tell a women you don't have a job or a stable job thats a no-no.

[KFBR392]

After forming a relatively uninformed opinion of you (based on your brief description), you sound like an un-motivated, procrastinating, shy, introvert who probably has some self esteem issues and lacks ambition. I honestly mean that in the nicest way possible. While none of these characteristics, individually - make you un-dateable, as a package they certainly don't help. While some of these traits may be hardwired into your personality (some people are naturally introverted - and that's ok), other traits can be changed. It sounds like you may have some work to do.

 

Having undesirable traits (everyone has some) is a lot more attractive when you have some positive traits to help offset them. Whether that's looks, athleticism, sense of humor, wittiness, financial/career success etc. There's a countless number of things, some of which I'm sure you already have, but there can always be more. People are naturally attracted to positive things.  Think about what you want in a life partner, and think about how suitable you'd be for that person.